The awesomeness of support we get on this board

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by MidwestMom, Feb 10, 2014.

  1. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    I can't believe how caring, supportive and wise the folks who post here are. It's like, or better than, a real life twelve step codependency or Narc-Anon meeting. The things we share, the messages we get, the lessons we learn, the instant responses to our suffering moms...it is beyond anything I have seen on a support board. Ever. This particular group of mothers seem to all be able to say just the right things to one another.

    I want to tell all of you...and, yes, if you are reading this, this means YOU, that I am grateful for your wisdom and appreciate everything you post and feel a strong bond with you all, even though we may never really meet.

    Just my own little good vent :)
     
    • Agree Agree x 4
    • Like Like x 2
    • List
  2. trinityroyal

    trinityroyal Well-Known Member

    Awww. MWM, reading your post felt like the best, huggiest hug.
    Thank you.
     
  3. helpangel

    helpangel Active Member

    Thanks MWM I totally agree! I've felt for years this place was better then a in person support group; no travel time, gas, hauling kids or hiring sitters and it's open 24 hours. Also I feel comfortable saying things here that I would never think of saying to anyone I had to look at while saying it (hope that made sense)

    There were some really rough years with Angel that I doubt I would have survived without all these caring parents to help me... Comes to mind the April fools day when Angel put the miralax in my coffee creamer... I was crying when I posted it but within an hour I was ROFL after hearing the responses and what everyone else's kids had done to make that day special.

    Back then without this place I doubt would have had motivation to pull myself out of bed many days. Thank you again for the reminder that while counting my blessings to include this site.

    Nancy
     
  4. Echolette

    Echolette Well-Known Member

    MWM, it is true, and thank you for highlighting this today. The group has been life-altering for me. I feel so much stronger and better buttressed in life knowing you are all out there, that you will pause in your day and read what I wrote, think about it, and respond with wisdom and kindness. I love the group sense of shared experience, and all the different personalities that come in to play.
    Good to be grateful!!!
    And I am.
    Echo
     
    • Agree Agree x 2
    • Like Like x 1
    • List
  5. Childofmine

    Childofmine trying to do this thing one day at a time Staff Member

    I completely agree MWM. It is such a gift to be able to speak our truth and have a group if people who have been there done that.

    Also knowing we can speak OUR truth and there is love and support and respect for each of us to make our own choices. There is respect.

    Also feeling a community of support as we work hard to deal with this pain, this suffering.

    And it is so good to write. By writing we can work things out. Sometimes we write it, post it, reread it and realize we have moved on past what we just wrote or it is actually something different.

    But still there is no judgment. Also lots of good practical ideas that are immediately helpful.

    I would love to go on a relaxing vacation with these women!

    So much gratitude for this board. Thank you all!


    Sent from my iPhone using ConductDisorders
     
    • Agree Agree x 3
    • Like Like x 1
    • List
  6. Echolette

    Echolette Well-Known Member

    My mouth literally dropped open and I broke into a huge smile at the idea of a group vacation!!! I LOVE that!
     
    • Agree Agree x 2
    • Like Like x 1
    • Winner Winner x 1
    • List
  7. lovemysons

    lovemysons Well-Known Member

    Another here that LOVES the board!

    Thanks MWM for this post. You made me smile.
    LMS
     
    • Like Like x 2
    • Friendly Friendly x 1
    • List
  8. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    I am very shy, but I think I'd probably feel at home if this board had a get together. We seem to think a lot alike and have our adult difficult children and having to detach in common...and we already know a lot about one another's inner demons. I share stuff here that I don't tell anyone else except my therapist. And, frankly, she has never been through it.
     
  9. Estherfromjerusalem

    Estherfromjerusalem Well-Known Member

    MWM, I couldn't agree with you more. This group is unique in so many positive ways.

    Love, Esther
     
    • Like Like x 2
    • Friendly Friendly x 1
    • List
  10. SeekingStrength

    SeekingStrength Well-Known Member

    When i first found this site, just a few weeks ago, i was so sad, so numb. This board helped pull husband and me up by our shoes. I couldn't prepare meals; i was mush. husband and I were acting like zombies.

    There was no judgement. There were many kind & gentle variations of, for crying out loud, he is 32yo, lol. That was tremendous for husband and me...having it validated (okay, softly smacking us upside our heads). We had been thinking, he is our child, how can we abandon him??

    The first 48 hrs, i pretty much kept clicking REFRESH, waiting on more wise replies. We are not near out of the woods, but we have strength when the next crisis arrives....and it is priceless.

    BEST resource on the Internet. Wished we never needed it, but we do and it is here.
     
  11. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I am home from a stressful day and the first thing I read is this post..........making me feel as if I am a part of something special, something which brings me such solace and allows me to share what I've learned along the way................thank you MWM for writing the words............... as we can see, we ALL agree with you.

    It brought to mind a dark, cold January morning, oh probably around 2 AM..........you all know those nights, when your terror and anguish about your difficult child prevents any sleep at all and keeps you up searching for answers, for something to make the pain go away, to bring some understanding..............something, anything.................anything..........that was two years ago and I was lost in my misery...............and I did a search for something, I can't recall what...........and up pops this board. I read story after story for hours on end..........I couldn't quite believe what I was reading................there are other parents out there who are going through THIS!? OMG. I wrote my first post. From that point to now, every day I am grateful that I found this forum..........

    I think about you all every day. "I wonder how Cedar and her husband are doing today............did LMS hear from young difficult child......how is MWM's pregnant daughter doing.............how did ECHO do on her son's birthday...........Is COM still sad today..............is helpangel's cat still in the basement..............is Janet really moving out..............hmmmm, is Trinity flying through the air today.................did SS's son contact them...............how is BITS today.......is Witz still having bad dreams.......is WF's son still okay?".............................and those who post less but I still think of them as well..........

    We here on the PE side have created a very special and unique energy which is palatable, it feels to me like a cocoon that I can enter at any time and in some ways I am always there ..........it feels as if I am encircled in a familiarity and similarity that because of our difficult child's and the fire hot pain we all have to withstand as we go through this process..........it's as if we are bonded in some deep ways that are difficult to articulate.

    Cedar once made the statement that what we go through here is a "devastation like no other" and those words have always resonated so strongly with me...................especially for us with adult difficult child's, where our hopes are diminished and we've been at it a lot longer............we're worn out and broken in ways our younger counter-parts are not............and...............we all know it too..............we're a tad older and life has shown us some pretty bizarre and scary things at this point................we now know the fragility of it all and we are learning just how powerless we really are...................not everyone has to go through that, not everyone has to learn these lessons.........we are the "chosen" ones, for better or worse, the ones who have to get on with life in spite of what the person we love the most in the world............is doing............or not doing.............This is a position no one in their right mind would want to be in and yet.................here we are.....................

    And, in the midst of our personal hell................we find others who are feeling all the same things, going through their own nightmare............... just like me. And that we found each other in the vast universe out there..............that we can write down our feelings and have another human being, who could be 10,000 miles away, respond to our cry...............soothe our broken parts.............offer a hand in the middle of the tsunami of horrors we are smack in the middle of...................that is something to be grateful for, that is something to celebrate.

    And we can still find joy in this place................we can still stand tall and make profound changes............we can still have faith in life and love and keep our hearts opened................we can still be vulnerable and trust life................and I believe if we move through this place, we can find that elusive peace............that sense that everything is okay, that acceptance of all that is.............

    So, thank you MWM for shining a light on the preciousness of this "soft place to land" I am most grateful, so appreciative and so blessed to be here...............my wish for all of us is that we find that peace and acceptance...........
     
    • Agree Agree x 1
    • Winner Winner x 1
    • List
Loading...