Total chaos and dysfunction

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Jules71, Mar 8, 2014.

  1. Jules71

    Jules71 Warrior Mom since 2007

    We seem to be spiraling downhill and more out of control everyday Our entire household. Me and husband are barely hanging on. difficult child has divided us for sure. difficult child is abusing easy child by trying to control him all the time and then insulting him if he doesn't do what difficult child wants. It is utter chaos around here and difficult child is the eye of the storm.

    I would like to find some kind of in-home family therapy but don't even know how to go about that. difficult child has seen a psychologist and counselor before but they never did any good and never approached it as a family thing and helped us come up with a plan. We need Super Nanny.

    What do you do when your spouse and you can't get on the same page because your spouse acts like a bigger difficult child than your actual difficult child? I think maybe I need to get a therapist. How do you find someone that you can connect with? It's emotionally exhausting telling your story... Do you just keep making appointments until you find someone you like? My friends can't relate and my mother doesn't know what to tell me. I am burning out big time.
  2. pasajes4

    pasajes4 Well-Known Member

    In home therapy can be a good thing depending on the counselor. You might be able to find one by going on line or contacting a phospital.
  3. jal

    jal Member

    Do you have a child and family agency local to you? We used their services years ago. We received in home services for difficult child twice a week. He also went there for therapy and worked with a psychiatrist for his medications.

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  4. jugey

    jugey Active Member

    Sounds very painful Jules. We contacted our city and tapped into in house therapy services but it wasn't useful because difficult child was an angel while they were in our home. That failure led us down the long path of finding a good psychologist. It took some time, maybe 4 or 5 different ones before we met the one! She was different from the get go and we knew she "got it". I specifically looked for someone that was familiar with the work of dr Ross Greene. She has been as much help to husband and I as she has been to difficult child. husband needed help understanding that difficult child is different and unresponsive to traditional parenting strategies. I hope you can find someone very soon and bring about some peace.
  5. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Seeing a therapist really helped me. It gave me someone to talk to that helped me to realize my reactions and thoughts to what I was experiencing was normal (although who knows what normal is anyways?).

    I'm sorry things are so difficult. When difficult child was your difficult child's age my difficult child seems much the same as years. Sending gentle hugs your way.