greenrene
Member
So, difficult child has been out of my home for almost 5 weeks now. Things around here have been so calm, so nice, so peaceful... I hate to say it, but I don't miss her at all. Not even a little bit.
My sister in law and brother in law, on the other hand, have been finding out first hand what we've been dealing with for all these years. They let her have a (restricted) phone and limited internet access, and difficult child wasted no time whatsoever in breaking the rules regarding those privileges. They have her on a pretty strict schedule with very strict rules, and her grades have improved somewhat, but in some ways her grades are the least of my worries. They have gotten difficult child more testing, not sure who with although I told sister in law that a neuropsychologist would be best, but the results aren't ready yet. They also have her seeing a new, additional therapist. It's been a really rough ride for everyone.
The new therapist doesn't think that sister in law's house is the best place for difficult child, but I also know that OUR house isn't, either. Honestly, the thought of difficult child coming back to live in my house makes me feel like I'm about to have an anxiety attack. She needs more help than we are able to provide, and I have 2 younger children that I have to protect, not to mention the new baby coming later this year. If it doesn't work at sister in law's house, I truly believe that the next step is a therapeutic boarding school.
This week difficult child is staying next door at my mother in law's because sister in law and family went out of town for winter break. Apparently she has been really acting out. She had an appointment with the new therapist last night, and this morning the therapist called husband and told him that difficult child had told her last night that she was molested (touched inappropriately, not raped) by our former neighbor's uncle (in KY) when she was around 5. husband said that difficult child was really wound up last night and was acting out a lot, and it carried through until this morning as well. We have no idea what to think about the molestation accusation. On one hand, difficult child is a habitual, almost pathological, liar - she is conniving, manipulative, deceitful, and has lied on MANY occasions about "abuse" (none this serious, however). She loves to try to get a reaction from people and get others into trouble, and it doesn't matter who she has to throw under the bus to meet that end. On the other hand, the person/circumstance that she is accusing is just so random, so obscure, so totally out of the blue... The time frame is off by a few years to where this could even have POSSIBLY happened, but I understand that those kinds of things can be confused in a child's mind. difficult child was hardly ever around this person at all. But, my biggest question is, if this really happened, why are we only finding out about this now? After all the therapists she's been to, some relatively long-term, why did she choose to tell THIS story to THIS therapist - IIRC, last night's appointment is only difficult child's second appointment with this therapist.
Never a dull moment in difficult child-world, even when they're no longer in your home...
by the way please, if any of you can point me in the direction of any good therapeutic boarding schools for teenage girls, please send me a PM. It's looking like it's more of a possibility, but I feel like I'm flying blind on just a Google search.
My sister in law and brother in law, on the other hand, have been finding out first hand what we've been dealing with for all these years. They let her have a (restricted) phone and limited internet access, and difficult child wasted no time whatsoever in breaking the rules regarding those privileges. They have her on a pretty strict schedule with very strict rules, and her grades have improved somewhat, but in some ways her grades are the least of my worries. They have gotten difficult child more testing, not sure who with although I told sister in law that a neuropsychologist would be best, but the results aren't ready yet. They also have her seeing a new, additional therapist. It's been a really rough ride for everyone.
The new therapist doesn't think that sister in law's house is the best place for difficult child, but I also know that OUR house isn't, either. Honestly, the thought of difficult child coming back to live in my house makes me feel like I'm about to have an anxiety attack. She needs more help than we are able to provide, and I have 2 younger children that I have to protect, not to mention the new baby coming later this year. If it doesn't work at sister in law's house, I truly believe that the next step is a therapeutic boarding school.
This week difficult child is staying next door at my mother in law's because sister in law and family went out of town for winter break. Apparently she has been really acting out. She had an appointment with the new therapist last night, and this morning the therapist called husband and told him that difficult child had told her last night that she was molested (touched inappropriately, not raped) by our former neighbor's uncle (in KY) when she was around 5. husband said that difficult child was really wound up last night and was acting out a lot, and it carried through until this morning as well. We have no idea what to think about the molestation accusation. On one hand, difficult child is a habitual, almost pathological, liar - she is conniving, manipulative, deceitful, and has lied on MANY occasions about "abuse" (none this serious, however). She loves to try to get a reaction from people and get others into trouble, and it doesn't matter who she has to throw under the bus to meet that end. On the other hand, the person/circumstance that she is accusing is just so random, so obscure, so totally out of the blue... The time frame is off by a few years to where this could even have POSSIBLY happened, but I understand that those kinds of things can be confused in a child's mind. difficult child was hardly ever around this person at all. But, my biggest question is, if this really happened, why are we only finding out about this now? After all the therapists she's been to, some relatively long-term, why did she choose to tell THIS story to THIS therapist - IIRC, last night's appointment is only difficult child's second appointment with this therapist.
Never a dull moment in difficult child-world, even when they're no longer in your home...
by the way please, if any of you can point me in the direction of any good therapeutic boarding schools for teenage girls, please send me a PM. It's looking like it's more of a possibility, but I feel like I'm flying blind on just a Google search.