Walls Closing In

Discussion in 'Substance Abuse' started by Diane C., Jan 7, 2014.

  1. Diane C.

    Diane C. New Member

    I am hoping someone can help me get my head and my heart on the same page. My grandson, who is now 18, is in his senior year of high school, and I have been raising him for the better part of his life. During the past 2 years, his attitude, behavior and grades have steadily declined, and he is now at risk of not graduating this spring. He has started lying about his whereabouts, using drugs, and has recently stolen money from friends and family. I have 2 adult children (not his parents) who live with me, and want me to kick my grandson out ASAP, especially since he shows no remorse for his actions, and will not improve his grades or seek a job. They fear the situation will escalate, and understandably, they are concerned about their property and the disruption this is creating in our home. I was hoping to get him to his graduation date, but my family feels the situation is becoming intolerable. They are disappointed that I have not taken more drastic measures, as they feel he is stepping all over me. I have confronted him and told him he needs to pay back the money taken, participate in the school's at risk counseling group, and pull up his grades to graduate, but not suprisingly, he is not taking me seriously. I know he is an adult, but since he is still in school, should I handle this differently, or do I need to kick him out before he destroys my family? I love him with all my heart, as I do my children, and I feel powerless and alone. Any suggestions or ideas will be deeply appreciated.
  2. keatingb

    keatingb New Member

    What types of drugs is he using?
  3. Diane C.

    Diane C. New Member

    Thanks for getting back to me so quickly - In addition to marijuana, I believe he is taking some type of prescription medication (source and type unknown). We don't have any prescription medications in the home, and I don't smell alcohol, nor is he hallucinating. Beyond that, I can't really tell. I just know his behavior is abnormal and erratic at times, and his pupils are dialated and eyes are glassy.
  4. comatheart

    comatheart Active Member

    Hmm, tough call. Sounds like something up and he's wearing out his welcome for sure. He needs help. I would encourage you to get him tested so you know what you're dealing with. Have him evaluated for substance abuse (Google the closest major city to you + "substance abuse evaluation" for places to call) and go from there. If they recommend inpatient treatment, there are places that will allow your grandson to do school there. The rehab my son went to was for adolescents, but had young adults all the way up to 25. Those that needed HS, or to complete their GED had classes for part of the day.
  5. Diane C.

    Diane C. New Member

    Thank you for your very helpful advice. I am hoping with all my heart that he agrees to enter treatment, as he definitely needs it, and I see no other way for him to turn his life around.
  6. keatingb

    keatingb New Member

    Dialated pupils normally mean some time of opiate. There are thousands of prescription medications sold on the streets. OxyContin, Roxy, Opanna, Dilaudits. I would pop him with a Urine test if possible. Sold at any convenient store. A 12 Panel. If he fails for some type of opiate then that is a problem. Highly addictive and dangerous.
  7. keatingb

    keatingb New Member

    If perhaps he is using some type of substance other than marijuana, I wouldn't suggest kicking him out just yet. See if he is willing to go to residential treatment. 60-90 day in-patient that handles substance abuse and behavior problems.
  8. GoingNorth

    GoingNorth Crazy Cat Lady

    Opiates cause abnormally CONTRACTED pupils. Some drugs that dilate the pupils are LSD. Molly, ecstasy, speed (including methamphetamine or "meth") LSD is seeing a resurgence in popularity.

    Mushrooms and peyote/mescaline cause dilated pupils as well and are still popular. I'd make drug testing by a lab that ONLY does drug testing, a condition of his remaining at home.

    You do have the right to search his room so long as he is staying in your home. Don't forget that you could be held liable for drugs found in your home/property. If found in amounts deemed for "distribution", you can lose your property in some jurisdictions.