Well, hmmmm

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by klmno, Dec 6, 2011.

  1. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    I came on this trip for work, exluding tomorrow which I'm taking as a vacation day, and I've already done all I can do today so I came back to the hotel. I guess I can find something to work on for a couple of hours, then try to prep for attny next week re. difficult child issues and maybe look for another to consult with, then plan for tomorrow....

    exxciting, Huh? Boss wanted me to take another trip here but why I don't know.
  2. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    Maybe this is the right time to grab a good easy read book, fix yourself some tea, grab a throw and excape from reality for awhile. DDD
  3. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Download mobireader on your cell and I will send you a few books to read. Find a corner, hide and read a book on their dime. Might as well. Thats what government contractors do best!
  4. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    I beg your pardon! LOL!

    I bit my tongue as long as I could then called PO's super. We had a civil talk and apparently, PO did tell her about what he'd recommended- as far as difficult child coming home with a caseworker but she over-rode it. Fine, but then there was no reason to call me up and go off on me acting like a DR. J and Mr. H. She defended him, of course, but I think she got the point- he could have been considerate enough to just say "look, after further thought and discussion, things have changed to ABC". Anyway, she is so sold on this group home. I talked to her about my concerns and she says she will talk to PO tomorrow- he's out today- and try to set up a video conference between them, me, and difficult child for next week. Now, I think her point is to prove why group home is the best solution and I completely understand why it's the first reaction. But, I still don't think a long term group home is in difficult child's best interest. But the super will choose particular words I say then tell me "see, that supports the group home decision", but if it doesn't support the group home decision, she says "well, we'll see what we can do" or "maybe after group home you can think about that". She said sometimes she is in the room when PO calls me- well, if not on speaker phone and me not being aware (which would be illegal in this state), that means she's only hearing his side of the conversation. I guess that explains why some of his verbage doesn't add up to a decent response to what I just said- he saying it for her benefit and to make it look like I said something different than what I did. A-hole. He's not doing anything except CYAing himself. I'm going to try to have an attny in on the video-conference.

    To me, it's (long term group home) the quick, easy answer, but not the best, most logical answer. It might solve 1 or 2 problems but the long term repercussions and domino effect are horrible.

    I just sooo want to get this job tomorrow, then try to get super to at least put "group home under consideration" or something instead of having it cast in stone.

    I kept stressing to her that PO went from 'least restrictive' placement of difficult child coming home with nothing but me enforcing 30 days house arrest to most restrictive placement short of incarceration- long term group home with him aging out of the system, and there are a lot of options in between that should be considered. (That's what last attny said should be point to argue in court.)
  5. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    You know I didnt mean you...lol.

    I would definitely point out that you think that the LRE that PO was advocating in the beginning was "what you were planning on" and had "moved to an appropriate area to be in difficult child's best interest." Whatever. He actually has the education which most in juvy dont. I dont get why they are so set against having him complete that. All you see on the jail shows is men completing their GED's or High School diploma's in jail. For heavens sake here is a kid in juvy that wants to actually complete high school in high school! I would imagine that is somewhat of a rarity.
  6. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    That's the thing with me DJ- in this state, their method is to use whatever a kid and parent want as carrots to dangle over their heads. That's stupid if it's something constructive that most would think they should be encouraging. If a kid was in Department of Juvenile Justice and didn't give a squat about school, they'd be using it as a punishment or requirement. But the very fact that difficult child is doing well in academics (and Lord knows, it's all he does well in), then it becomes the 'carrot'.

    Along with that- this group home apparently has had ZERO kids go to mainstream school. They either get a GED after quitting or go to alternative school. Yes, a couple have used that to take a few classes at a community college. That's it. But does anyone in CSU look at that? NO

    And then I told super about difficult child's previous harming of self and allowing others to harm him and having scars on his body as a result. She said "well, then we will just order group home people to take him to therapy" I said the lady told me they had NO licensed MH prof. She said they would order them to take difficult child out into the community for MH counseling. I said Hmmm. She said "well, after OUR people evaluation him and determine that's what he needs". Uh Uh- and those "people" of theirs- they aren't MH profs and only will look at last paper from Department of Juvenile Justice- which isn't squat.

    This is a very closed system in this state- they couldn't care less what any licensed MH prof says- no matter if the person is on state level or not.
  7. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    thats why I said come here. We are open. If he were here, private psychiatrists go into the jails to see the inmates. Now Im not gonna say they get to see them often. It can take time. You wont waltz into the local jail and say I need to see a psychiatrist and get one that afternoon but you will get one. mental health is separate from the prison system though if you do end up in adult prisons they do intake so they separate the people with mental health issues from people with no mental health but I think that is normal for adult prisons.

    I know in what we call training schools which is what your son is in now, they separate the kids out and those that need mental health care get psychiatrists coming in or they go out in a van to see a local psychiatrist. Also therapists are seen at the training schools and the kids are put into units building skills. Look up online about training schools in NC if you want and you will get the low down on them. That might give you some information on how they transition kids from them out into the community too.
  8. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    Well, as you know, I'm working on that!