BusynMember
Well-Known Member
When my little grandson was born, I noticed that he wouldn't make eye contact when he was held. He was very young...weeks old...but I remembered my own kids staring at me in my arms. Or trying to look into my face. Intently. Grandson would look around the room, but not at me. Alarmed, I mentioned this to my daughter, who was his babysitter at the time, and told her to see if he made eye contact with her. She hadn't been paying attention to that.
Unfortunately, my daughter told my daughter-in-law that I was worried about autism. She hadn't told my daughter-in-law in a vicious way. It was more like, "Mom is worrying again" and she had no idea that daughter in law would go ballistic, call me, and get so abusive and mean that I almost ended up in the hospital for the first time in fifteen years. It wasn't that I cared about daughter in law's crazy reaction. It was because she had told me that my son had given her permission to yell at me and that if I ever did that again I'd never see my grandchild again. Things have been tense between us since then and son told me he never gave her permission to do that. He said, "How could I stop her?" They are verging on divorce now and she is being extremely abusive to my son, but the story here is about my grandson who I always call George on this forum.
George will interact with people and show things to people and laugh and scream and make silly noises. But George is "different." George does not speak AT ALL. He is 16 months (just starting walking last month and is still unsteady). He doesn't say one word. He says "dada" but my son swears he doesn't connect "dada" to him. He doesn't say "Mama" at all. (Haha, daughter in law). And he totally freaks in groups of people he doesn't know. My son reports that he sometimes calld George, and George doesn't respond to his name. George's hearing is ok. He never gets ear infections either.
A few weeks ago, even daughter in law noticed George's, as son calls it, delays. They had somebody (I don't know who) assess George. He qualified for early services in speech, and daughter in law just freaked out. Son said she was wailing and crying and couldn't accept it and finally said she wasn't going to send him because he'll be ok. Son can't take him alone, without her permission. So he isn't getting any services.
I'm not 100% sure he is on the autism spectrum, but I have an eerie feeling that he has Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified. He is not so bad that he doesn't try to communicate. He does try. But he is not your average kid and he reminds me so much of my Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified child L. Fortunately, right now he does not rage or tantrum. He just tends to freak out in crowds, not ride well in the car, he doesn't really play with toys (more picks them up, looks at them, then drops them) and can't communicate with even a word. Yet he CAN blow a kiss and I think he waves bye-bye.
daughter in law is not the brightest bulb on the chandeleir. daughter in law's mother has a drinking problem and has a breathalyzer in her car yet daughter in law insists her mother isn't an alcoholic--that she just drinks when she goes out to have a good time. Um, yup. daughter in law doesn't really read much or talk much to George or spent one-one time with him. She drags him around to play with his cousins while she talks to her sister (this is her favorite activity) and George really needs somebody to work with him. Visiting his older cousins isn't helping him.
It's a mess. I feel badly about George,but since I don't think of Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified as the end of the world I just wish he'd get some services. That way, if I"m wrong and he doesn't have it, he's at least getting help for his speech. There is no doubt that this child has delays and differences.
The ironic and sad thing is that I was probably right from Day One.
This is sort of just a vent. If anyone can offer alternatives to what it may be other than Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified, I'm up for hearing it. He does NOT behave like a child with just ADHD. I would say that's definitely not the issue.
Thanks for reading my frustrating. There is nothing I can do.
Unfortunately, my daughter told my daughter-in-law that I was worried about autism. She hadn't told my daughter-in-law in a vicious way. It was more like, "Mom is worrying again" and she had no idea that daughter in law would go ballistic, call me, and get so abusive and mean that I almost ended up in the hospital for the first time in fifteen years. It wasn't that I cared about daughter in law's crazy reaction. It was because she had told me that my son had given her permission to yell at me and that if I ever did that again I'd never see my grandchild again. Things have been tense between us since then and son told me he never gave her permission to do that. He said, "How could I stop her?" They are verging on divorce now and she is being extremely abusive to my son, but the story here is about my grandson who I always call George on this forum.
George will interact with people and show things to people and laugh and scream and make silly noises. But George is "different." George does not speak AT ALL. He is 16 months (just starting walking last month and is still unsteady). He doesn't say one word. He says "dada" but my son swears he doesn't connect "dada" to him. He doesn't say "Mama" at all. (Haha, daughter in law). And he totally freaks in groups of people he doesn't know. My son reports that he sometimes calld George, and George doesn't respond to his name. George's hearing is ok. He never gets ear infections either.
A few weeks ago, even daughter in law noticed George's, as son calls it, delays. They had somebody (I don't know who) assess George. He qualified for early services in speech, and daughter in law just freaked out. Son said she was wailing and crying and couldn't accept it and finally said she wasn't going to send him because he'll be ok. Son can't take him alone, without her permission. So he isn't getting any services.
I'm not 100% sure he is on the autism spectrum, but I have an eerie feeling that he has Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified. He is not so bad that he doesn't try to communicate. He does try. But he is not your average kid and he reminds me so much of my Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified child L. Fortunately, right now he does not rage or tantrum. He just tends to freak out in crowds, not ride well in the car, he doesn't really play with toys (more picks them up, looks at them, then drops them) and can't communicate with even a word. Yet he CAN blow a kiss and I think he waves bye-bye.
daughter in law is not the brightest bulb on the chandeleir. daughter in law's mother has a drinking problem and has a breathalyzer in her car yet daughter in law insists her mother isn't an alcoholic--that she just drinks when she goes out to have a good time. Um, yup. daughter in law doesn't really read much or talk much to George or spent one-one time with him. She drags him around to play with his cousins while she talks to her sister (this is her favorite activity) and George really needs somebody to work with him. Visiting his older cousins isn't helping him.
It's a mess. I feel badly about George,but since I don't think of Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified as the end of the world I just wish he'd get some services. That way, if I"m wrong and he doesn't have it, he's at least getting help for his speech. There is no doubt that this child has delays and differences.
The ironic and sad thing is that I was probably right from Day One.
This is sort of just a vent. If anyone can offer alternatives to what it may be other than Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified, I'm up for hearing it. He does NOT behave like a child with just ADHD. I would say that's definitely not the issue.
Thanks for reading my frustrating. There is nothing I can do.
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