Welp, ut oh

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by GuideMe, Nov 14, 2014.

  1. GuideMe

    GuideMe Active Member

    difficult child just right now came in the room, all upset. B stole one of her things. difficult child is in rage and getting dressed to kick B's a** now and she just walked out the door. Great!!!! Just what the hell I need. I can take no more.
  2. GuideMe

    GuideMe Active Member

    This is so damn sad. I known B for a long time, and would never predict things would go this way. This is very strange to see difficult child and B like this.Wow.
  3. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Relax. This isn't your problem. It is between your daughter and B. If she kicks her butt, she kicks her butt. If you want peace, don't even ask her about it. Shut your ears if she starts telling you about it. This is one of those things that does not concern you as you are not a part of it and you can't change it. When 37 starts b****g about his ex, I tune it out and sing in my head, "La, la, la, I'm not listening." I mean, I've heard it enough and I can't control his ex and, truth be told, HE MARRIED HER. That's why he has to share his child with her. Trust me, everyone tactfully tried to get him to think hard before he tied the knot, but did he listen? Is the Pope Catholic?

    B was probably always like she is, but you just saw the good in her or she put on a great act. difficult children are classic at charming goodhearted people so that they can get a temporary invite (they realize it won't last) so that they can cut your screen, drive your car, be able to be as irresponsible as their difficult child hearts desire. Her own parents might have called t he cops. If my kids had done that, guess who would have been called? Nope, not Ghostbusters!!! I did call the cops on my daughter when I found her smoking weed in our house at fifteen and she was put on probation. I was hopi9ng it would help her.

    I would file the "B Saga" under "Bad Experiences That I Never Want to Think About Again" and let it be a learning experience. Kids are not normally thrown out of their homes because of Bad Daddy and Mommy. It is usually because they are completely out of control and impossible to live with and even dangerous. They have probably had hundreds of chances to straighten out, but didn't. It probably broke their parents hearts to make B leave. There are two sides to every story.

    I would stop calling her B. I'd call her Bee. She shore STUNG you. Now do something nice for yourself and try to remember, there is nothing you can do about what your daugher and Beesting do and worrying about their drama is pointless and not even your business. Cross Beesting out of your life and move on. We all live and learn :)

    Take care and certainly vent if you get overly stressed.
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    Last edited: Nov 14, 2014
  4. GuideMe

    GuideMe Active Member

    My keyboard is finally working, Thank you God for that. I thought my computer was done.

    Thank you MWM, but getting caught up in the drama, I am not nor will I ever. This might float other peoples boat , but I can tell you, I am sick to death a million times over, over all of this. Anyway, the point of my post is, this whole situation with Bee (bzzzzzzz) is just still shocking to me. She caused so much damage here and she wasn't even here a full 48 hours. In addition to all of this, I also found an open wine bottle in my car. So not only did she take my car, she was drinking and driving in my car and didn't even have the decency to throw it away to at least try and hide from me what she did. It rolled out from under my seat while I was driving. What if I got into a car accident and they found that open container? They would automatically assume that I was drinking! I know I said it a million times, but I can't believe this is Bee. I can't believe she actually did all of this. To see her fall so low is quite tragic, especially after she builds herself up so much to be something to great. Just painful to watch. Bee has officially lost whatever friends she had left, she lost all my respect and now I totally see her as someone who never cared about my daughter or respected her (obviously), never respected me (obviously). I never really knew her like I thought I did and I must say, I am so happy to have been the one to have thrown her the hell out. She received her consequences swift and firm from me, let's see if she ever dares to think to disrespect me or my daughter again, even in her mind. You do NOT treat people who did everything in the world to help you THIS way. NO!

    Anyway, difficult child came home, nothing happened that I know of, except for difficult child basically destroying Bee's friendship circle and whatever ounce of dignity Bee had left. Let this be a warning to anyone who comes across these forums in the future... that even letting someone stay at your house for a day could wind up in such catastrophe and who knows what else would have happened had I not caught her right away. After thinking about it, I do not put it past Bee that she would have had all her thugs over here eventually, sneaking in and out, that would have been a MAJOR mistake on her part, because then I would have called the police and her mother to seek charges. We still don't know if she stole anything else and it has me worried. Maybe this was a blessing in disguise. My daughter loved and hung onto every word Bee said for MANY years, ugh , it was sickening. Not anymore. Hopefully that friendship is over perm because it was never a true friendship, like difficult child thought it was. My difficult child had to learn the lesson the hard way, but lesson learned....at least for now.
  5. Hope_Floats

    Hope_Floats Member

    This actually may help your difficult child in the long run. Interesting that she got to see what it's like to be on the other side - the victim of the disrespect and theft, versus the perpetrator. Interesting, albeit tragic, to get a small dose of their own medicine, so to speak.
  6. GuideMe

    GuideMe Active Member

    Very , very true Hope. The only reason why Bee took my car instead of my daughters car is because my daughter's car had zero gas, so not drivable, where as mine, had a full tank. Had my daughter had gas in her car, Bee would have took hers instead.

    My imagination ran wild on me today... what if my daughter had gas in her car, Bee took it and crashed it/damaged it somehow? (with no serious injuries to Bee of course, even though I think she is rotten right now, I don't wish her any physical harm). That would have been one hell of a lesson for difficult child to learn. And then I could finally say to difficult child when difficult child started crying about it :

    "god, can you please stop b*tch*ng to me about it? You keep bringing it up over and over again, just LET IT GO. You never let things go. God just suck it up and deal with it like everybody else does"

    Man, I can't help but want to say to her the same things she says to me. Man that would be karma at it's finest.

    But of course, given a choice, I would never want or wish for that to happen. But sometimes, you do fantasize lol.

    Oh and the next item to come up missing, a large bottle of expensive perfume that I have......I'm thinking I might need to change the locks. Who knows if Bee took one of my extra keys to the house. I can't remember how many I had and my daughter had a few in her room too. So there goes another goddamn expense.
  7. Scent of Cedar *

    Scent of Cedar * Well-Known Member

    This was good for me to read this morning, too.

    Ha! That seems so wrong! I always think I am supposed to be listening, that eventually the poison will work its way out and everything will be the way it is er, well...in my imagination.

    It never does seem to work out that way, though.

    Point well taken, given our current situation.

    I am so grateful you found the open wine bottle. That would have been impossible to explain, had you been stopped or been in an accident, yourself.

    These have been hard lessons for you, and for your daughter, too. But the more I read, the more I am beginning to see a little glimmering of an idea that difficult child people (or maybe, it is drug use that does it?) even when they are our own children, create their own situations. And part of the way they do that is through betraying trust.

    It was an extraordinarily kind thing of you to do, to welcome Bzzzz sting-sting-sting into your home.

    What a rat she was, to steal your perfume.

    She must have gone through all of your belongings, to know just where it was!

    That is so personally hurtful and offensive.

    I am so sorry she took it to that level.