As you know, my daughter is in jail.
Today, the huge storage unit that stored most of her things from her marriage and when the children were growing up............(before the suicide 14 years ago, which destroyed it all)..........went up for auction for non payment. My daughter, in her mentally skewered state which included hoarding, refused to allow her daughter and her 2 step daughters or anyone to have any of their fathers pictures or sentimental objects.........the kids have asked her for years and years, to no avail. Today, the 3 girls went to the auction with their paternal grandfather, my SO and their Dad's cousin and purchased the unit for $100. The other auctioneers found out the story and not one of them bid on it. The girls were all crying. I cried when I heard that. My SO said, as the guy asked for bids, the other participants all just looked at the ground.
They opened the unit to find their childhood before them. Their Dad's kitchen things, he loved to cook, his cookbooks, his pictures from elementary school, all of it. I was at work, but my SO let me know how happy the girls were to go through the stuff and retrieve the items from their Dad.
My daughter knew the auction was today, but has no idea who purchased it.
After 14 years, this feels like a completion for my granddaughter and her sisters.........and for my daughter as well. I'm sure she is having a bad day, I have not spoken to her in over a week. I asked her not to call me with drama.
You may recall, we took her cats to the local shelter, so the 2 things that have kept my daughter spinning in circles for years and years, trying to keep those cats and that storage unit........ are now gone.
It has been an odd day.
When we talked about this auction, I was very supportive but I didn't want any involvement at all and my SO and granddaughter understood completely.
I have a very real sense of an emptiness, it's a strange feeling of being so comforted to know that the girls are able to find pieces of their childhood and their father which is bringing them a real completion..........and to know that my daughter is alone in jail, having lost her cats and her belongings. She has often been cruel and lacking in empathy for what others go through and today it seems she has received her just due. I am in the middle of all of those feelings of elation and sadness and oddly, it's as if they all cancel each other out and I end up feeling empty.
I am 'being' with it all........just allowing the feelings to be present. It's such a strong feeling of an ending of an era..........the good, the bad and most certainly, the ugly.
Everyone is respecting my wishes for non involvement so I am interestingly on the outside, not a big participant, observing from a safe distance. Perhaps that's the distance which is the right one for me now........I don't feel embroiled in any of it............watching with a good dose of neutrality.
This feels like a demarcation, a crossroad in the journey where the major players go their separate ways.....today was also my granddaughters senior presentation which marks the end of a year long project and ushers her into the final days of her High School years.
After I left work I went for a massage which was planned before I knew about the auction or jail time......somehow it seemed so fitting to be in a serene environment being nurtured.......exactly where I wanted to be.
We all seem to have turned a corner........I'm not sure which way we are all going............. but we are clearly on our way.
Today, the huge storage unit that stored most of her things from her marriage and when the children were growing up............(before the suicide 14 years ago, which destroyed it all)..........went up for auction for non payment. My daughter, in her mentally skewered state which included hoarding, refused to allow her daughter and her 2 step daughters or anyone to have any of their fathers pictures or sentimental objects.........the kids have asked her for years and years, to no avail. Today, the 3 girls went to the auction with their paternal grandfather, my SO and their Dad's cousin and purchased the unit for $100. The other auctioneers found out the story and not one of them bid on it. The girls were all crying. I cried when I heard that. My SO said, as the guy asked for bids, the other participants all just looked at the ground.
They opened the unit to find their childhood before them. Their Dad's kitchen things, he loved to cook, his cookbooks, his pictures from elementary school, all of it. I was at work, but my SO let me know how happy the girls were to go through the stuff and retrieve the items from their Dad.
My daughter knew the auction was today, but has no idea who purchased it.
After 14 years, this feels like a completion for my granddaughter and her sisters.........and for my daughter as well. I'm sure she is having a bad day, I have not spoken to her in over a week. I asked her not to call me with drama.
You may recall, we took her cats to the local shelter, so the 2 things that have kept my daughter spinning in circles for years and years, trying to keep those cats and that storage unit........ are now gone.
It has been an odd day.
When we talked about this auction, I was very supportive but I didn't want any involvement at all and my SO and granddaughter understood completely.
I have a very real sense of an emptiness, it's a strange feeling of being so comforted to know that the girls are able to find pieces of their childhood and their father which is bringing them a real completion..........and to know that my daughter is alone in jail, having lost her cats and her belongings. She has often been cruel and lacking in empathy for what others go through and today it seems she has received her just due. I am in the middle of all of those feelings of elation and sadness and oddly, it's as if they all cancel each other out and I end up feeling empty.
I am 'being' with it all........just allowing the feelings to be present. It's such a strong feeling of an ending of an era..........the good, the bad and most certainly, the ugly.
Everyone is respecting my wishes for non involvement so I am interestingly on the outside, not a big participant, observing from a safe distance. Perhaps that's the distance which is the right one for me now........I don't feel embroiled in any of it............watching with a good dose of neutrality.
This feels like a demarcation, a crossroad in the journey where the major players go their separate ways.....today was also my granddaughters senior presentation which marks the end of a year long project and ushers her into the final days of her High School years.
After I left work I went for a massage which was planned before I knew about the auction or jail time......somehow it seemed so fitting to be in a serene environment being nurtured.......exactly where I wanted to be.
We all seem to have turned a corner........I'm not sure which way we are all going............. but we are clearly on our way.