Hi everyone, I have an 18 year old son (I asked him to leave home back in November) who lives with a friend and the friend's mother. He was caught 3 times with pot in my home, breaking rules, etc... and to protect my other children and my marriage it was time to ask him to leave. I still cry about this decision every other day. He has no help, nor does he appear to w ant help. Up until now I've believed that my son was "only" smoking pot. I don't think that pot doesn't suggest a problem, but somehow I was able to tell myself that pot isn't so bad. Well, he never comes around anymore (he is a very bright, athletic kid), he's lost weight, quit college, lost his job (now unemployed for approximately 8 months) and I have no idea of what he is up to. I do see pics occasionally on facebook which will show him and friends drinking and smoking pot using a bong (I apologize for the lingo). Last night we got him to go to a hockey game with the family (bought him fries and coke, it was the first we've seen him since Christmas). My other son decided to go out with him after the game but came home early because him and his buddies decided to get high and drink. This isn't my other son's thing, he has severe allergies and quite honestly i think drugs scare the hell out of him. He said they were smoking pot but putting sugar on top of it before they smoked it. What is this? My son seriously thinks it was sugar and he said it made the pot look shiny. Please help if you can. Is this crack or meth? I really just don't know what any of this stuff looks like. Has anyone's child done this? I feel so guilty, i've never taken my son for help because we never knew he had a problem until it was too late. Even when I asked to leave for breaking our rules repeatedly I didn't think he had a huge problem, I just thought he was smoking pot once in awhile and didn't want to follow our house rules. I feel so helpless and guilty. I just cry for the boy i used to have. I cry for him because i know he's not happy with himself and he knows he's given up his dreams. His little brothers and his sister who used to idolize him think he's a complete loser now and want nothing to do with him. It's breaking my heart...I'm scared. I've told him we'll get him help, he just needs to tell us he wants it, he doesn't want it. he doesn't think he needs any. What else can I do? Thanks so much for your help.