TiredSoul
Warrior Mom since 2007
I know this has probably been a topic here many times - but I think I need a refresher.
I would love to hear about ANYTHING (programs, counseling, medication, diet, vitamins, etc.) that has worked for your child when it comes to opposition and defiance. Is there anything that eliminates this behavior or do the adults in his life just have to constantly manage his behavior and change their expectations?
I am not seeing the stimulant medication my difficult child takes for ADHD having any positive effects on his ODD. I am beginning to go back to the idea that his behavior is a result of our parenting (poor fit). Everything is a POWER STRUGGLE. I have always given him lots of choices --like which bowl do you want... which cup... do you want to wear this coat or that coat, or no coat... etc.
The problems arise when 1) he doesn't get his way, and 2) we need him to do or not do something. I cannot possible reason with him every time he doesn't like what I am asking/telling him to do. For ex. he is riding his bike on our street. I give him advance warnings about when it's time to put his bike away and come in (10 mins, 5 mins, ok time to come in). He tells me NO. I say YES you need to come in. He says NO. I try to catch him, he peddles faster... I look like an idiot running down the street yelling get back here! See I know the answer to this - he doesn't get to ride his bike the next time. Does he care? Maybe, maybe not - he just finds some other way to torment me. Everything and everyday is a battle.
He thinks he is the adult, can do what he wants, and can tell us what to do. He is 6 years old! He told me last night after we left the store with ice cream instead of pop cicles that he hated me, wanted a different mom, etc., etc. Then after we got home and he got over it and wanted some ice cream - told me to get him some. I told him no - because I did not like his behavior. He told me to get him some or die. He told me to make the choice - he said which one do you choose? Get me some ice cream or I kill you. Hmmmm- WTH. I don't think so. I am tired of doing this everyday and it seems time is ticking too fast and before you know it my baby will be a terrible-teenager.
I need ideas. Thanks for listening.
I would love to hear about ANYTHING (programs, counseling, medication, diet, vitamins, etc.) that has worked for your child when it comes to opposition and defiance. Is there anything that eliminates this behavior or do the adults in his life just have to constantly manage his behavior and change their expectations?
I am not seeing the stimulant medication my difficult child takes for ADHD having any positive effects on his ODD. I am beginning to go back to the idea that his behavior is a result of our parenting (poor fit). Everything is a POWER STRUGGLE. I have always given him lots of choices --like which bowl do you want... which cup... do you want to wear this coat or that coat, or no coat... etc.
The problems arise when 1) he doesn't get his way, and 2) we need him to do or not do something. I cannot possible reason with him every time he doesn't like what I am asking/telling him to do. For ex. he is riding his bike on our street. I give him advance warnings about when it's time to put his bike away and come in (10 mins, 5 mins, ok time to come in). He tells me NO. I say YES you need to come in. He says NO. I try to catch him, he peddles faster... I look like an idiot running down the street yelling get back here! See I know the answer to this - he doesn't get to ride his bike the next time. Does he care? Maybe, maybe not - he just finds some other way to torment me. Everything and everyday is a battle.
He thinks he is the adult, can do what he wants, and can tell us what to do. He is 6 years old! He told me last night after we left the store with ice cream instead of pop cicles that he hated me, wanted a different mom, etc., etc. Then after we got home and he got over it and wanted some ice cream - told me to get him some. I told him no - because I did not like his behavior. He told me to get him some or die. He told me to make the choice - he said which one do you choose? Get me some ice cream or I kill you. Hmmmm- WTH. I don't think so. I am tired of doing this everyday and it seems time is ticking too fast and before you know it my baby will be a terrible-teenager.
I need ideas. Thanks for listening.