Put basically, J almost always shows the worst of himself when he is with other kids, particularly in new situations. He is so readily conflictual and antagonistic. About the best essay I've read about ADHD, written by a French Canadian doctor, described J to a T. It talked about how these kids create and develop relationships based on rivalry that tend to be quarrelsome. Yes, J does rivalry and quarrelsome very well, even though with me or one to one with adults he can be so sweet and adorable. A friend came over this afternoon with her son and friend, aged 9 and 7 or 8. J refused to share his toys, was rude, pushed one of the boys at one point. He seemed to really antagonise them both, although to be fair later on in the afternoon he was being more co-operative and socially aware. When he plays by himself in the house, he plays long games of imagination, involving dialogues and lots of inventive "happenings" that are nonetheless very calm and concentrated... I have never seen him play like this with other kids - could be he does, at school or elsewhere, but I only ever seeing him having these "jockeying for position" conversations and interactions with other boys. Girls he seems to play with co-operatively. I'm a bit concerned about it. I think this is J's real area of handicap. I don't know how, if at all, I can help him with it. Today I just got rather cross with him and told him firmly that when guests come to the house, he must share his toys with them. Which he very reluctantly did, eventually. I don't know what the payoff for him in behaving like this is - attention? I tried talking to him afterwards about it a little but I also don't want to dramatise the situation. I could see the other boys were irritated by and mocking his behaviour... Does he get anxious, insecure? I'm not worried about school. I am worried about this.