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Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
1 year later, nothing has changed. Trying to let go, i need help
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<blockquote data-quote="Calamity Jane" data-source="post: 554423" data-attributes="member: 13882"><p>Welcome, HHE:</p><p></p><p>You would think that the gun arrest and 4 year probation would have scared him straight. If he was on a full ride at state college, he is surely smart enough to know that what he continues to do will only lead him down a very scary and dangerous path.</p><p></p><p>His spotty job history, his staying out of your home for days at a time, his phone records as well as his friend's suspicions probably point to his drug dealing activity. I know you feel terrified for him and helpless - of course you would - you're his mom. Have you spoken directly to him about getting help and has he rejected it or has he denied that he needs help? If so, it proves that intelligence does not equate with judgement for many young people. You can be smart and foolish all at once. Drug users also sell drugs to fuel their own habit, so he may be involved with more than just pot, as you say. </p><p></p><p>If your son refuses any offer of help from you, then perhaps it is a good choice to tell the po. You also may be under the impression that he's staying at his girlfriend's mother's house, but if you don't know these people, he may just be telling you a lie. on the other hand, if he is staying with his girlfriend's mother, and selling drugs there, it may not be long before he's arrested or thrown out by her. There will be no good outcome if it continues like this. I urge you to get help and support for yourself as well - it may be a lifesaver for you, too. </p><p>Good luck, keep posting and again, welcome. Many helpful and insightful people will be along to offer support shortly.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Calamity Jane, post: 554423, member: 13882"] Welcome, HHE: You would think that the gun arrest and 4 year probation would have scared him straight. If he was on a full ride at state college, he is surely smart enough to know that what he continues to do will only lead him down a very scary and dangerous path. His spotty job history, his staying out of your home for days at a time, his phone records as well as his friend's suspicions probably point to his drug dealing activity. I know you feel terrified for him and helpless - of course you would - you're his mom. Have you spoken directly to him about getting help and has he rejected it or has he denied that he needs help? If so, it proves that intelligence does not equate with judgement for many young people. You can be smart and foolish all at once. Drug users also sell drugs to fuel their own habit, so he may be involved with more than just pot, as you say. If your son refuses any offer of help from you, then perhaps it is a good choice to tell the po. You also may be under the impression that he's staying at his girlfriend's mother's house, but if you don't know these people, he may just be telling you a lie. on the other hand, if he is staying with his girlfriend's mother, and selling drugs there, it may not be long before he's arrested or thrown out by her. There will be no good outcome if it continues like this. I urge you to get help and support for yourself as well - it may be a lifesaver for you, too. Good luck, keep posting and again, welcome. Many helpful and insightful people will be along to offer support shortly. [/QUOTE]
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Parent Emeritus
1 year later, nothing has changed. Trying to let go, i need help
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