Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
1 year later, nothing has changed. Trying to let go, i need help
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Hopingforthe best" data-source="post: 554533" data-attributes="member: 12294"><p>Thank you so much for your support and kind words, and i appreciate your wellcome. I posted here before about one year ago so i am not a complete visitor, and thus the title. I don't know why but i truly thought in my heart that something would click in his mind and help him change. During this past year, there have been breaks when he stopped using and then started so that's why i had so much hope. My difficult child is such a kind person and he has never been violent but pot has overtaken his life. My fear and despair has not helped things either, and i did try to go to Al-non one time but didn't go back, so i started seeing a therapist and went for three months and that didn't work - i probably didn't give it time. I try to keep busy, i work a lot of hours a week and i went back to school this semester so i am trying to live my life.</p><p></p><p>The reason i feel paralyzed with fear is because i used to be a difficult child. I was raped when i was a teenager and thereafter became very promiscucous. I never used drugs and drank alcohol only occasionally but it was a difficulty period and i would have given anything for my son to live a normal life because i know how difficult child life changes who you are. It wasn't until i gave birth to difficult child that i started putting my life together. Unfortunately, i paid a big price because i found out soon after i gave birth to my him that i was HIV positive. He was negative and i have led a normal and healthy life for many years - i still do and have been a good provider. I started taking medication Just two months ago after many many years of living with the virus. </p><p></p><p>I didn't tell my difficult child about my status until he was a junior in high school thinking that he was mature enough to understand but i think that was a mistake because he started smoking marijuana the following year, and i blame myself a little bit for this. Last year, when my difficult child was open to therapy, he joined me in one of the sessions and he told the therapist that he was still angry with me for telling him about my illness and he wished i never did. it was heartbreaking for me and painful. Anyway i can't do anything about that now and i feel a little resentful towards my own son for that because i know i would never have had that kind of reaction towards my mom even when i was i difficult child. So i keep hoping he will learn and stop wasting his life before it's too late.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Hopingforthe best, post: 554533, member: 12294"] Thank you so much for your support and kind words, and i appreciate your wellcome. I posted here before about one year ago so i am not a complete visitor, and thus the title. I don't know why but i truly thought in my heart that something would click in his mind and help him change. During this past year, there have been breaks when he stopped using and then started so that's why i had so much hope. My difficult child is such a kind person and he has never been violent but pot has overtaken his life. My fear and despair has not helped things either, and i did try to go to Al-non one time but didn't go back, so i started seeing a therapist and went for three months and that didn't work - i probably didn't give it time. I try to keep busy, i work a lot of hours a week and i went back to school this semester so i am trying to live my life. The reason i feel paralyzed with fear is because i used to be a difficult child. I was raped when i was a teenager and thereafter became very promiscucous. I never used drugs and drank alcohol only occasionally but it was a difficulty period and i would have given anything for my son to live a normal life because i know how difficult child life changes who you are. It wasn't until i gave birth to difficult child that i started putting my life together. Unfortunately, i paid a big price because i found out soon after i gave birth to my him that i was HIV positive. He was negative and i have led a normal and healthy life for many years - i still do and have been a good provider. I started taking medication Just two months ago after many many years of living with the virus. I didn't tell my difficult child about my status until he was a junior in high school thinking that he was mature enough to understand but i think that was a mistake because he started smoking marijuana the following year, and i blame myself a little bit for this. Last year, when my difficult child was open to therapy, he joined me in one of the sessions and he told the therapist that he was still angry with me for telling him about my illness and he wished i never did. it was heartbreaking for me and painful. Anyway i can't do anything about that now and i feel a little resentful towards my own son for that because i know i would never have had that kind of reaction towards my mom even when i was i difficult child. So i keep hoping he will learn and stop wasting his life before it's too late. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
1 year later, nothing has changed. Trying to let go, i need help
Top