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Substance Abuse
17 yr old son doing drugs, hanging w members of a gang in NY
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<blockquote data-quote="defiantchild" data-source="post: 675676" data-attributes="member: 18543"><p>Copa, it's so nice to hear from you. That's quite a story about enrolling in the class. Wow, I totally can relate to that. Your complete refusal to give up on him. To guide and protect, monitor him...incredible to which lengths we are willing to go. Thank goodness you found this sit. I feel fortunate too for this site, and my elderly friend, who continue to support me in NOT doing that which I intuitively want to do. </p><p></p><p>Last night we were driving home from my father in law's birthday party (both my husband's parents were born on Christmas. My mother in law passed away 19 years ago...) and we were talking to Difficult Child in the car about what he is going to do with his life. He said he was thinking about getting his GED and going to culinary school in the fall. But he said he couldn't work and study at the same time, it's too much pressure and he needs some 'down time' to relax and hang out with his friends. So my husband said perhaps instead of working full time, he could work part time - 3 days a week - and take courses to prepare for the test. </p><p></p><p>My husband doesn't think we should emancipate him now if he's really serious about doing the course for his GED. I don't believe he's disciplined enough nor mature enough to do it. But maybe I need to think more like Victor Frankl? It's so hard to know what to do! I am having such a hard time with him living here and taking advantage of us. After such a nice evening with family last night, he said he was going out with friends, never came home last night and now it's 5pm the next day and we still haven't heard from him. This is the kind of thing that drives me insane...I feel so abused. </p><p></p><p>My husband said we should come up with a list of options for him, for example: </p><p>1. Live on a Kibbutz as suggested by svenghandi</p><p>2. Get emancipated and live entirely on your own with some financial support from us for your rent</p><p>3. Live at home, follow the rules, and study for you GED/work</p><p>4. Job Corps</p><p></p><p>I think the whole thing is a joke bc why wouldn't he select #3? He won't follow the rules and there's nothing we can do about it. So we are back to square one. What do you think?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="defiantchild, post: 675676, member: 18543"] Copa, it's so nice to hear from you. That's quite a story about enrolling in the class. Wow, I totally can relate to that. Your complete refusal to give up on him. To guide and protect, monitor him...incredible to which lengths we are willing to go. Thank goodness you found this sit. I feel fortunate too for this site, and my elderly friend, who continue to support me in NOT doing that which I intuitively want to do. Last night we were driving home from my father in law's birthday party (both my husband's parents were born on Christmas. My mother in law passed away 19 years ago...) and we were talking to Difficult Child in the car about what he is going to do with his life. He said he was thinking about getting his GED and going to culinary school in the fall. But he said he couldn't work and study at the same time, it's too much pressure and he needs some 'down time' to relax and hang out with his friends. So my husband said perhaps instead of working full time, he could work part time - 3 days a week - and take courses to prepare for the test. My husband doesn't think we should emancipate him now if he's really serious about doing the course for his GED. I don't believe he's disciplined enough nor mature enough to do it. But maybe I need to think more like Victor Frankl? It's so hard to know what to do! I am having such a hard time with him living here and taking advantage of us. After such a nice evening with family last night, he said he was going out with friends, never came home last night and now it's 5pm the next day and we still haven't heard from him. This is the kind of thing that drives me insane...I feel so abused. My husband said we should come up with a list of options for him, for example: 1. Live on a Kibbutz as suggested by svenghandi 2. Get emancipated and live entirely on your own with some financial support from us for your rent 3. Live at home, follow the rules, and study for you GED/work 4. Job Corps I think the whole thing is a joke bc why wouldn't he select #3? He won't follow the rules and there's nothing we can do about it. So we are back to square one. What do you think? [/QUOTE]
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17 yr old son doing drugs, hanging w members of a gang in NY
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