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Substance Abuse
19 year old son on a dangerous down spiral.
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<blockquote data-quote="RN0441" data-source="post: 718501" data-attributes="member: 15032"><p>Hi Mamma</p><p></p><p>Welcome and sorry you have to be here but glad you found us.</p><p></p><p>As you can see by my signature, our son's downward spiral started at 15 with weed and continued and he is now 22 and still battling addiction but no longer in our home thankfully.</p><p></p><p>It sounds like your son is depressed. It is possible that he is using harder drugs also? What about alcohol use?</p><p></p><p>It is so hard when our Difficult Child think that marijuana will help with depression. It is a fact that it makes it worse. Double hard since it is legal there! But like alcohol, not all can use socially.</p><p></p><p>Your son is not thriving and living the normal life of a 19 year old. He should be working full time or in school full time or a combination of the two. </p><p></p><p>Everyone here loves their sons or daughters. It's not even a question of love. It's a question of them growing up and functioning in society. You are not going to live forever; none of us our. You may have made mistakes along the way by enabling his behaviors, but all of us have.</p><p></p><p>You have a daughter that needs you. Your son is a grown man, whether he acts like one or thinks he's one or not. The fact is that he is. He is not that little boy any longer and you need to treat him like the man that he is. </p><p></p><p>I would probably suggest seeing a therapist for yourself that has some experience with addiction/depression (most do) to help you figure out how you can set healthy boundaries for yourself. Your son needs these as well. Nothing changes if nothing changes. Time goes by fast and you don't want a 30 year old sitting on your couch asking what's for dinner!</p><p></p><p>Perhaps they can help you set some guidelines on what is expected of him to live in your home. You should focus on your disabled daughter and yourself and your husband.</p><p></p><p>Keep posting and reading and others will be along to offer their thoughts and advice. Take what you need and leave the rest. We are all here trying to help and support one another.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="RN0441, post: 718501, member: 15032"] Hi Mamma Welcome and sorry you have to be here but glad you found us. As you can see by my signature, our son's downward spiral started at 15 with weed and continued and he is now 22 and still battling addiction but no longer in our home thankfully. It sounds like your son is depressed. It is possible that he is using harder drugs also? What about alcohol use? It is so hard when our Difficult Child think that marijuana will help with depression. It is a fact that it makes it worse. Double hard since it is legal there! But like alcohol, not all can use socially. Your son is not thriving and living the normal life of a 19 year old. He should be working full time or in school full time or a combination of the two. Everyone here loves their sons or daughters. It's not even a question of love. It's a question of them growing up and functioning in society. You are not going to live forever; none of us our. You may have made mistakes along the way by enabling his behaviors, but all of us have. You have a daughter that needs you. Your son is a grown man, whether he acts like one or thinks he's one or not. The fact is that he is. He is not that little boy any longer and you need to treat him like the man that he is. I would probably suggest seeing a therapist for yourself that has some experience with addiction/depression (most do) to help you figure out how you can set healthy boundaries for yourself. Your son needs these as well. Nothing changes if nothing changes. Time goes by fast and you don't want a 30 year old sitting on your couch asking what's for dinner! Perhaps they can help you set some guidelines on what is expected of him to live in your home. You should focus on your disabled daughter and yourself and your husband. Keep posting and reading and others will be along to offer their thoughts and advice. Take what you need and leave the rest. We are all here trying to help and support one another. [/QUOTE]
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19 year old son on a dangerous down spiral.
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