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2 Ungrateful Daughters
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<blockquote data-quote="hamsterdance" data-source="post: 714831" data-attributes="member: 22048"><p>Basic operant conditioning.. reward positive behaviour and punish negative behaviour</p><p></p><p>What you're doing is the opposite.</p><p></p><p>These girls act up, because they keep getting rewards for it.. you keep buying them stuff. Your punishments are just you taking away stuff you bought them, so, while they're adult women, you're reinforcing the idea that these adult women don't really own anything they have.. which tends to really tick off a person.</p><p></p><p>Main thing is.. they're not the one with the problem. You are.</p><p></p><p>They don't have a problem with cussing you out, or being mean to you or each other.</p><p></p><p>You do.</p><p></p><p>What you have to do is make your problem their problem.</p><p></p><p>They don't need cars and what-not to be in college. A car is a privilage. If they want a car, they can get a job and work for one. If they want a cellphone, they can use their student aid money to get one.</p><p></p><p>You can keep on paying for college... but .. you need these ladies to start footing their own bills.</p><p></p><p>And leave them alone.</p><p></p><p>Don't invite them over to the house (if they stay at college, just tell them to stay at college).</p><p></p><p>Stop talking to them. Stop coddling them. Give them the cold shoulder.</p><p></p><p>When you stop talking to them they may realize they've crossed some kind of line with you and perhaps try to seek amends after they've had time to think things over.</p><p></p><p>Most people only appreciate something based on how much blood, sweat and tears (and money) they gave of themselves to it. Since these women are getting free cars, free cellphones, etc... they don't care.</p><p></p><p>Make them work for it. If they want something in life, make them go work for it. They are going to throw a kicking screaming fit over that if this comes as a shocker... but, that's why you dont' invite them over to the house anymore. Tell them to go a year in college and never come home until a year has gone by. They are not allowed back in the house.</p><p></p><p>Kids, regardless of age, will still keep acting like children if you keep treating them like children.. by giving them things and then taking them away, like they're toys.</p><p></p><p>Get them out of the house. Stop talking to them. Let them figure things out on their own. They should be hanging out at the college with friends and doing whatever and learning to grow up and live like a broke college student (which builds character) instead of living like princesses that have privilage without responsibility.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="hamsterdance, post: 714831, member: 22048"] Basic operant conditioning.. reward positive behaviour and punish negative behaviour What you're doing is the opposite. These girls act up, because they keep getting rewards for it.. you keep buying them stuff. Your punishments are just you taking away stuff you bought them, so, while they're adult women, you're reinforcing the idea that these adult women don't really own anything they have.. which tends to really tick off a person. Main thing is.. they're not the one with the problem. You are. They don't have a problem with cussing you out, or being mean to you or each other. You do. What you have to do is make your problem their problem. They don't need cars and what-not to be in college. A car is a privilage. If they want a car, they can get a job and work for one. If they want a cellphone, they can use their student aid money to get one. You can keep on paying for college... but .. you need these ladies to start footing their own bills. And leave them alone. Don't invite them over to the house (if they stay at college, just tell them to stay at college). Stop talking to them. Stop coddling them. Give them the cold shoulder. When you stop talking to them they may realize they've crossed some kind of line with you and perhaps try to seek amends after they've had time to think things over. Most people only appreciate something based on how much blood, sweat and tears (and money) they gave of themselves to it. Since these women are getting free cars, free cellphones, etc... they don't care. Make them work for it. If they want something in life, make them go work for it. They are going to throw a kicking screaming fit over that if this comes as a shocker... but, that's why you dont' invite them over to the house anymore. Tell them to go a year in college and never come home until a year has gone by. They are not allowed back in the house. Kids, regardless of age, will still keep acting like children if you keep treating them like children.. by giving them things and then taking them away, like they're toys. Get them out of the house. Stop talking to them. Let them figure things out on their own. They should be hanging out at the college with friends and doing whatever and learning to grow up and live like a broke college student (which builds character) instead of living like princesses that have privilage without responsibility. [/QUOTE]
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