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Substance Abuse
20 Year Old Son has drug problem
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<blockquote data-quote="toughlovin" data-source="post: 541773"><p>I have come to believe that the best thing you can do is to let them know you love them, that you will help them when they want help and you won't enable their drug use. Really you can't do anything else. As they say in alanon, you didn't cause it, you can't cure it, and you can't control it. That is just really true. I really suggest if you can find a parent alanon meeting that you go and invite your wife (and ex) to go with you. I have found that really helpful.</p><p></p><p>And the best thing you can do is to do what you are doing... keep the relationship going as much as you can. It is impossible to really have a good relationship with a drug addict because the drugs will be more important to them than you... but as Nancy says eventually if you don't enable them there will be consequences that start making it worth it to them to get help... and at that point you are there to help them.</p><p></p><p>And we all know on this board the terror we live with that our kids will overdose or not make it in some other way. But you just have to keep finding ways to live your life and to enjoy it as much as you can.</p><p></p><p>TL</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="toughlovin, post: 541773"] I have come to believe that the best thing you can do is to let them know you love them, that you will help them when they want help and you won't enable their drug use. Really you can't do anything else. As they say in alanon, you didn't cause it, you can't cure it, and you can't control it. That is just really true. I really suggest if you can find a parent alanon meeting that you go and invite your wife (and ex) to go with you. I have found that really helpful. And the best thing you can do is to do what you are doing... keep the relationship going as much as you can. It is impossible to really have a good relationship with a drug addict because the drugs will be more important to them than you... but as Nancy says eventually if you don't enable them there will be consequences that start making it worth it to them to get help... and at that point you are there to help them. And we all know on this board the terror we live with that our kids will overdose or not make it in some other way. But you just have to keep finding ways to live your life and to enjoy it as much as you can. TL [/QUOTE]
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20 Year Old Son has drug problem
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