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Substance Abuse
20 yr.old pothead...angry husband...2 seperate issues
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<blockquote data-quote="Woriedmom" data-source="post: 630536" data-attributes="member: 18061"><p>I think it's progress that I can now separate these 2 issues even more now that my son is out of the house. I see and understand why my husband was so hurt, although he took it to the extreme...I still understand. Just little things like making sure my sons church clothes is ironed just right and not worrying so much about my husbands shirts.Or...perhaps in the past when I would make my sons sandwiches for school ( when we first married ) I would reach for the slices in the middle of the loaf to be sure he was given the softest. Although I made sandwiches for my husband also...never did that for him. I know..I know..shame on me. I shouldn't have been fixing my 17 year old his lunch anyway right? lol</p><p></p><p>My husband has his own set of anger issues that go back to when he started using. I don't think he got the attention that he wanted and needed from his parents, especially his mother.Thus, he has been demanding this from me soon after we married in 2009. I mean ALL of my attention. He even feels as if he is in some kind of competition with my son for not only my attention but my love. I don't know how to treat this kind of problem. I know I have my own set of issues but that's totally separate and not aimed at him. </p><p></p><p>My son the pothead and God knows what else he is using is bringing on another issue of course the 2 are linked but I can see where the separation is. My husband knows the behavior and habits,etc. of a substance abuser because he was one himself. When he tells me things about my sons behavior and my own co-dependency with my son I can see it now, especially from reading the book. </p><p></p><p>I will add that the Lord knew just how our pleasant surprise could be my motivation to keep pressing on, she's only 2 and yet brings smiles and laughter to my life. I think the Lord not only gave her the gift of life for herself but is saving mine at the same time. She is my sunshine in this storm<img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/angel.png" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":angel:" title="angel :angel:" data-shortname=":angel:" />.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Woriedmom, post: 630536, member: 18061"] I think it's progress that I can now separate these 2 issues even more now that my son is out of the house. I see and understand why my husband was so hurt, although he took it to the extreme...I still understand. Just little things like making sure my sons church clothes is ironed just right and not worrying so much about my husbands shirts.Or...perhaps in the past when I would make my sons sandwiches for school ( when we first married ) I would reach for the slices in the middle of the loaf to be sure he was given the softest. Although I made sandwiches for my husband also...never did that for him. I know..I know..shame on me. I shouldn't have been fixing my 17 year old his lunch anyway right? lol My husband has his own set of anger issues that go back to when he started using. I don't think he got the attention that he wanted and needed from his parents, especially his mother.Thus, he has been demanding this from me soon after we married in 2009. I mean ALL of my attention. He even feels as if he is in some kind of competition with my son for not only my attention but my love. I don't know how to treat this kind of problem. I know I have my own set of issues but that's totally separate and not aimed at him. My son the pothead and God knows what else he is using is bringing on another issue of course the 2 are linked but I can see where the separation is. My husband knows the behavior and habits,etc. of a substance abuser because he was one himself. When he tells me things about my sons behavior and my own co-dependency with my son I can see it now, especially from reading the book. I will add that the Lord knew just how our pleasant surprise could be my motivation to keep pressing on, she's only 2 and yet brings smiles and laughter to my life. I think the Lord not only gave her the gift of life for herself but is saving mine at the same time. She is my sunshine in this storm:angel:. [/QUOTE]
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20 yr.old pothead...angry husband...2 seperate issues
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