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21 year old help
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<blockquote data-quote="toughlovin" data-source="post: 676231" data-attributes="member: 15801"><p>I too have a daughter who is a junior in college. She also is very together, has a job, does well in school etc. She is living at school and so only comes home for visits.... And when she is here I sometimes too feel taken advantage of and yet I love having her come home too.</p><p></p><p>It sounds to me like your daughter is being sensible. She is not driving after drinking which is very important. I am sure she also wants to spend time with her boyfriend which is very normal at this age. The fact is at this age they do not think about us as much as we think about them. We are not the center of their universe nor should we be.</p><p></p><p>So yes have a heart to heart with her about how you need help when she is home.... But I would let go of the feeling of being a hotel and her coming and going.... I think that is normal behavior for her age and it is part of her gaining her independence. I do think she should help out around the house if she is living with you..... But given her age I think it makes sense to relax some of the other parental rules and roles. It is hard at time to figure out the shift in the relationship that happens when our children become adults.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="toughlovin, post: 676231, member: 15801"] I too have a daughter who is a junior in college. She also is very together, has a job, does well in school etc. She is living at school and so only comes home for visits.... And when she is here I sometimes too feel taken advantage of and yet I love having her come home too. It sounds to me like your daughter is being sensible. She is not driving after drinking which is very important. I am sure she also wants to spend time with her boyfriend which is very normal at this age. The fact is at this age they do not think about us as much as we think about them. We are not the center of their universe nor should we be. So yes have a heart to heart with her about how you need help when she is home.... But I would let go of the feeling of being a hotel and her coming and going.... I think that is normal behavior for her age and it is part of her gaining her independence. I do think she should help out around the house if she is living with you..... But given her age I think it makes sense to relax some of the other parental rules and roles. It is hard at time to figure out the shift in the relationship that happens when our children become adults. [/QUOTE]
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