Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
21-year-old pregnant, we are overwhelmed
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Nomad" data-source="post: 765052" data-attributes="member: 4152"><p>You've already gotten so much good insight and advice.</p><p>I tend to agree with your husband, as well.</p><p>Taking on the responsibility of your grandchild and/or your daughter along with the child, will only cause further emotional and financial strain. You might gently suggest to her to consider putting the baby up for adoption. If she would not consider this, then perhaps consider making a few calls to social services to get some general information on benefits that she would be entitled to as an unemployed mom. It sounds like you are already aware that there are some. You've already been through so much with this child, it would be unfair to you and your husband to continue with years and years of strife.</p><p>My thought is to help her <em>minimally </em>and from <em>afar.</em> Help her with information and maybe if you feel you can afford it with an occasional gift card for the food store or something along these lines...putting boundaries all over the place and trying to stay as detached as possible. Consider offering her , again if you can afford it, paying for short term counseling if she express interest and seems genuine. Bottom line, I would <em>not</em> hurt your health , your home life, your relationship with your husband. You've already been through many years of this. This is a heartache like none other. I hope she will consider putting this child up for adoption...but if not...<em>stay strong</em> and make <em>"boundaries" your middle name </em>and accept that this is how it very likely NEEDS to be. Also, consider short term therapy for<em> yourself. </em>Again, this stuff is <em>HARD and support for you is imperative. </em></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nomad, post: 765052, member: 4152"] You've already gotten so much good insight and advice. I tend to agree with your husband, as well. Taking on the responsibility of your grandchild and/or your daughter along with the child, will only cause further emotional and financial strain. You might gently suggest to her to consider putting the baby up for adoption. If she would not consider this, then perhaps consider making a few calls to social services to get some general information on benefits that she would be entitled to as an unemployed mom. It sounds like you are already aware that there are some. You've already been through so much with this child, it would be unfair to you and your husband to continue with years and years of strife. My thought is to help her [I]minimally [/I]and from [I]afar.[/I] Help her with information and maybe if you feel you can afford it with an occasional gift card for the food store or something along these lines...putting boundaries all over the place and trying to stay as detached as possible. Consider offering her , again if you can afford it, paying for short term counseling if she express interest and seems genuine. Bottom line, I would [I]not[/I] hurt your health , your home life, your relationship with your husband. You've already been through many years of this. This is a heartache like none other. I hope she will consider putting this child up for adoption...but if not...[I]stay strong[/I] and make [I]"boundaries" your middle name [/I]and accept that this is how it very likely NEEDS to be. Also, consider short term therapy for[I] yourself. [/I]Again, this stuff is [I]HARD and support for you is imperative. [/I] [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
21-year-old pregnant, we are overwhelmed
Top