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26 year old son beat up my 30 year old daughter
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<blockquote data-quote="BackintheSaddle" data-source="post: 617638" data-attributes="member: 17503"><p>So sorry to hear about all this-- how much pain you must be in. I do want to add that if he's still in jail, there's a good chance you can get him involuntarily committed somewhere, even for 2-3 days so that he's assessed by the mental health center in your area. They will assess him for suicidal ideations and also set him up with a discharge plan that could include living at a halfway house, further treatment, medications, etc. Given the danger of the situation for you and your daughter, I am certain a judge would set that up and you could then be assured that he won't be back for at least a little while and he's in the 'system' that can give him the help he needs. He's a grown man though and making these choices so the best way you can show your love for him is to step back and detach so has to stand on his own. That's easier said than done but something you can work on every hour of every day and remind yourself that your 'tough love' may be the very thing that ultimately saves his (and your) life!</p><p>Another idea I wanted to offer if you don't want to go the commitment route is to go stay with a family member or friend, or even a hotel, for the first week or so that you know he's out (and don't answer calls from him like suggested earlier)...not sure you're situation will allow for that but please strongly consider it to make it hard for him to find you and hurt you or your daughter even more...I'm in a similar situation now and really, going to a therapist or al-anon or somewhere that you can hear others and share your feelings will help so much in gaining perspective...the best way to help him is to set the boundaries that are so very hard to set and maintain and you will need a support system for doing that...my thoughts and prayers are with you</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BackintheSaddle, post: 617638, member: 17503"] So sorry to hear about all this-- how much pain you must be in. I do want to add that if he's still in jail, there's a good chance you can get him involuntarily committed somewhere, even for 2-3 days so that he's assessed by the mental health center in your area. They will assess him for suicidal ideations and also set him up with a discharge plan that could include living at a halfway house, further treatment, medications, etc. Given the danger of the situation for you and your daughter, I am certain a judge would set that up and you could then be assured that he won't be back for at least a little while and he's in the 'system' that can give him the help he needs. He's a grown man though and making these choices so the best way you can show your love for him is to step back and detach so has to stand on his own. That's easier said than done but something you can work on every hour of every day and remind yourself that your 'tough love' may be the very thing that ultimately saves his (and your) life! Another idea I wanted to offer if you don't want to go the commitment route is to go stay with a family member or friend, or even a hotel, for the first week or so that you know he's out (and don't answer calls from him like suggested earlier)...not sure you're situation will allow for that but please strongly consider it to make it hard for him to find you and hurt you or your daughter even more...I'm in a similar situation now and really, going to a therapist or al-anon or somewhere that you can hear others and share your feelings will help so much in gaining perspective...the best way to help him is to set the boundaries that are so very hard to set and maintain and you will need a support system for doing that...my thoughts and prayers are with you [/QUOTE]
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26 year old son beat up my 30 year old daughter
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