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28 yo son with Bipolar
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 732025" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>Beta. What could you have done five years ago? Mental illness often does not manifest until 17, 18, 22, 28 years. Or if it does it may be in the form of attentional deficits or hyperactivity or anxiety in the normal range like in our case.</p><p></p><p>How do you treat something that has not yet been revealed? And hormones too enter the mix. And their brains grow. They are able to understand and to make sense of their lives in a different way. This takes time to evolve, work out and hopefully resolve.</p><p></p><p>The points I make are: this may not have existed/manifested 5 years ago, as it is today.</p><p></p><p>This is theirs to own. Their life story to live, to own. To deal with. That is the hard part.</p><p></p><p>We may have no real role.</p><p></p><p>We feel obligation. We feel responsibility. We are bereft. Helpless. Desperate.</p><p></p><p>But do we have agency, in another adult's life?</p><p></p><p>We keep trying. We set conditions. We set limits. We have expectations. But he is the one with the will to want and do what he must do. Which is to say what he wants.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 732025, member: 18958"] Beta. What could you have done five years ago? Mental illness often does not manifest until 17, 18, 22, 28 years. Or if it does it may be in the form of attentional deficits or hyperactivity or anxiety in the normal range like in our case. How do you treat something that has not yet been revealed? And hormones too enter the mix. And their brains grow. They are able to understand and to make sense of their lives in a different way. This takes time to evolve, work out and hopefully resolve. The points I make are: this may not have existed/manifested 5 years ago, as it is today. This is theirs to own. Their life story to live, to own. To deal with. That is the hard part. We may have no real role. We feel obligation. We feel responsibility. We are bereft. Helpless. Desperate. But do we have agency, in another adult's life? We keep trying. We set conditions. We set limits. We have expectations. But he is the one with the will to want and do what he must do. Which is to say what he wants. [/QUOTE]
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28 yo son with Bipolar
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