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4 hours with daughter...
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<blockquote data-quote="Childofmine" data-source="post: 701146" data-attributes="member: 17542"><p>When they were little I loved the car rides together but as D.C. got older I was a captive audience. I remember one car ride when he went on and on about the merits of hookah. I didn't even know what it was. </p><p></p><p>Come try it with me Mom. Strawberry margarita is so good. It only costs $10 mom and we can do it together. Come on Mom. You don't inhale so it doesn't hurt you. It's completely safe. </p><p></p><p>On and on. My head was spinning. I had never heard of it and I didn't know what to believe.</p><p></p><p>Of course, that was early days. Hookah seems extremely tame now compared with all that came after. </p><p></p><p>They love to "poke the bear." It's a kind of manipulation. And like a trained rat, i always reacted. Giving him just what he wanted, that negative attention. </p><p></p><p>He loved the shock value and my naïveté. </p><p></p><p>It took me a long time, but finally I became an actor. I learned how to defuse it by saying...hmmmm, okay, putting a distracted look on my face, changing the subject, ignoring what he said...okay honey, whatever...you should have seen the look on his face when I first started that...extreme disappointment...which reinforced my new behavior. Once I got that down pretty well...and I had a lot of practice because he ramped up and up and up the more I deflected...he began to stop doing it because he didn't get the reaction he wanted. Then I would come straight out and say: I don't want to talk about that. He would get embarrassed. </p><p></p><p>Finally it stopped completely. It took a long long time and i backslid many times but finally we unhooked that very sick dance we were doing with each other.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Childofmine, post: 701146, member: 17542"] When they were little I loved the car rides together but as D.C. got older I was a captive audience. I remember one car ride when he went on and on about the merits of hookah. I didn't even know what it was. Come try it with me Mom. Strawberry margarita is so good. It only costs $10 mom and we can do it together. Come on Mom. You don't inhale so it doesn't hurt you. It's completely safe. On and on. My head was spinning. I had never heard of it and I didn't know what to believe. Of course, that was early days. Hookah seems extremely tame now compared with all that came after. They love to "poke the bear." It's a kind of manipulation. And like a trained rat, i always reacted. Giving him just what he wanted, that negative attention. He loved the shock value and my naïveté. It took me a long time, but finally I became an actor. I learned how to defuse it by saying...hmmmm, okay, putting a distracted look on my face, changing the subject, ignoring what he said...okay honey, whatever...you should have seen the look on his face when I first started that...extreme disappointment...which reinforced my new behavior. Once I got that down pretty well...and I had a lot of practice because he ramped up and up and up the more I deflected...he began to stop doing it because he didn't get the reaction he wanted. Then I would come straight out and say: I don't want to talk about that. He would get embarrassed. Finally it stopped completely. It took a long long time and i backslid many times but finally we unhooked that very sick dance we were doing with each other. [/QUOTE]
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