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4 year old acting out-- Need advice
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<blockquote data-quote="Melfee" data-source="post: 603524" data-attributes="member: 16715"><p>Hello everyone. I am new to this site but it seems super informative and helpful. I'm hoping I could get some advice as to which direction to take. Here's my short story:</p><p></p><p>My boyfriend and I have been together for a year and a half now. He has a kid from a previous relationship. He will be 5 in two weeks. The boyfriend and i moved in together about a little over a month ago. I understand that kids act out because of change but its getting to the point where I don't know what to do because i'm jumping in to something i've never dealt with and trying to get rid of some bad habits that were formed before me. He has seen his mom a total of maybe 7 times his whole life. She is pretty much non existent. For a while they lived with the boyfriend's mom and she let him do whatever he wanted. She let him play video games all the time and watch tv. She even made him separate dinners than what they were eating so he could have something he liked!!! </p><p>Now he lives with me.... the new evil step mom (dads girlfriend is what he calls me.)</p><p> </p><p>He has been hitting kids, throwing toys at them and screaming and crying every day. He has a hard time sharing toys with others too. This all happens while at daycare. He is a super smart funny young kid but he has real social problems. When we pick him up we always get a report on what he has done wrong and how many time outs he had that day. I think pretty soon he might be kicked out of this awesome place. </p><p>At home he normally does fairly well. He always helps clean the house. He dishes are always in the sink. There isn't really a fight when its bed time. We do have an extremely hard time with him at dinner time though. I always make sure there is something he likes but i also add a veggie and something new to try. OMG wow the screaming and crying that goes on is almost too much for me. </p><p>We do not let him play video games at our house either. We are always doing activities or trying to get him to play outside. I need to get him interacting and off his butt. He gets really mad that I stopped that. </p><p></p><p>Just recently I made a new chart that is on the fridge. Its an angry birds chart (it's his fave). It has every day of the week on it. If he was good at day care he gets to put a red bird on the top row. If he was good at home he puts one in the bottom row. Now if hes bad he has to put a green pig there instead. I told him if he gets 5 in a row of red birds we will go to the dollar store<img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /> It may be too new of a process but it doesn't seem to be helping. </p><p></p><p>He freaked out today and started to hit me. Hes been getting worst. I know he doesnt like to live here with me. He lets me know at least once a day. He wants to live with gma. Its so heart breaking. I don't know what to do... </p><p>One thing i thought of is he no longer has naps but he sleeps for 10 hours at night... should i be letting him take a short nap in the afternoon? Im afraid if i do he wont be as good getting to bed at night. </p><p></p><p>Any advice for me The new mom would be appreciated. </p><p>Thank you in advanced</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Melfee, post: 603524, member: 16715"] Hello everyone. I am new to this site but it seems super informative and helpful. I'm hoping I could get some advice as to which direction to take. Here's my short story: My boyfriend and I have been together for a year and a half now. He has a kid from a previous relationship. He will be 5 in two weeks. The boyfriend and i moved in together about a little over a month ago. I understand that kids act out because of change but its getting to the point where I don't know what to do because i'm jumping in to something i've never dealt with and trying to get rid of some bad habits that were formed before me. He has seen his mom a total of maybe 7 times his whole life. She is pretty much non existent. For a while they lived with the boyfriend's mom and she let him do whatever he wanted. She let him play video games all the time and watch tv. She even made him separate dinners than what they were eating so he could have something he liked!!! Now he lives with me.... the new evil step mom (dads girlfriend is what he calls me.) He has been hitting kids, throwing toys at them and screaming and crying every day. He has a hard time sharing toys with others too. This all happens while at daycare. He is a super smart funny young kid but he has real social problems. When we pick him up we always get a report on what he has done wrong and how many time outs he had that day. I think pretty soon he might be kicked out of this awesome place. At home he normally does fairly well. He always helps clean the house. He dishes are always in the sink. There isn't really a fight when its bed time. We do have an extremely hard time with him at dinner time though. I always make sure there is something he likes but i also add a veggie and something new to try. OMG wow the screaming and crying that goes on is almost too much for me. We do not let him play video games at our house either. We are always doing activities or trying to get him to play outside. I need to get him interacting and off his butt. He gets really mad that I stopped that. Just recently I made a new chart that is on the fridge. Its an angry birds chart (it's his fave). It has every day of the week on it. If he was good at day care he gets to put a red bird on the top row. If he was good at home he puts one in the bottom row. Now if hes bad he has to put a green pig there instead. I told him if he gets 5 in a row of red birds we will go to the dollar store:) It may be too new of a process but it doesn't seem to be helping. He freaked out today and started to hit me. Hes been getting worst. I know he doesnt like to live here with me. He lets me know at least once a day. He wants to live with gma. Its so heart breaking. I don't know what to do... One thing i thought of is he no longer has naps but he sleeps for 10 hours at night... should i be letting him take a short nap in the afternoon? Im afraid if i do he wont be as good getting to bed at night. Any advice for me The new mom would be appreciated. Thank you in advanced [/QUOTE]
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