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General Parenting
7yrs raging over the small things all the time.
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<blockquote data-quote="buddy" data-source="post: 465729" data-attributes="member: 12886"><p>I suspect that this is all or in part is because he has Aspergers. All of this is just "in general" here so not trying to make all people sound alike. One common thing among all folks on the autism spectrum including Asperger's is that they just have a hard time taking another person's perspective/point of view. If you can't do that well then it is hard to feel sorry or even genuinely happy for another person. It is not the same as someone who is anti-social in a psychotic or just a "mean" kind of way....it is a skill deficit of sorts. They care for people but just dont understand. </p><p>We still teach them to say sorry but it is a social function to help them get along in society, at work, etc. Something they learn to do by rote (when this or this happens you say sorry so things can calm down and move on). We can never teach our kids to actually <strong>feel </strong>sorry. My son actually said to his Integrated Listening Systems (ILS) worker yesterday...(after her saying, "do you have anything to say for what happened?") "R?, Is it ok if I just tell you sorry, but I dont really mean it?" He will ask the same question when he is to say thank you or other kinds of social terms. It does make things harder because the whole world revolves around them. I personally am never worried that it means my son is going to become a criminal that hurts people. He WANTS to have friends and does care about people, just can't feel how they feel and doesn't register the feelings that non Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) folks might feel.</p><p>Does that make any sense? Just MHO....</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="buddy, post: 465729, member: 12886"] I suspect that this is all or in part is because he has Aspergers. All of this is just "in general" here so not trying to make all people sound alike. One common thing among all folks on the autism spectrum including Asperger's is that they just have a hard time taking another person's perspective/point of view. If you can't do that well then it is hard to feel sorry or even genuinely happy for another person. It is not the same as someone who is anti-social in a psychotic or just a "mean" kind of way....it is a skill deficit of sorts. They care for people but just dont understand. We still teach them to say sorry but it is a social function to help them get along in society, at work, etc. Something they learn to do by rote (when this or this happens you say sorry so things can calm down and move on). We can never teach our kids to actually [B]feel [/B]sorry. My son actually said to his Integrated Listening Systems (ILS) worker yesterday...(after her saying, "do you have anything to say for what happened?") "R?, Is it ok if I just tell you sorry, but I dont really mean it?" He will ask the same question when he is to say thank you or other kinds of social terms. It does make things harder because the whole world revolves around them. I personally am never worried that it means my son is going to become a criminal that hurts people. He WANTS to have friends and does care about people, just can't feel how they feel and doesn't register the feelings that non Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) folks might feel. Does that make any sense? Just MHO.... [/QUOTE]
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