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General Parenting
9 yr old Oppositional Defiance Disorder with PTSD
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<blockquote data-quote="timer lady" data-source="post: 77778" data-attributes="member: 393"><p>Yes, Todd, I've done this times 2 (the tweedles dee & dum, adopted from an abusive/neglectful bio home).</p><p></p><p>I agree with meowbunny in that you are in for the ride of your life if your difficult child has had any abuse issues. Both of my children are diagnosis'd with severe Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD), complex PTSD & bipolar.</p><p></p><p>We are in our 7th year; wm has had 2 Residential Treatment Center (RTC) placements & is currently in long term treament home. His twin sister is here at home but has been in Residential Treatment Center (RTC), along with several hospitalizations & many in home services.</p><p></p><p>Having said that, before you sign on the dotted line negotiate into your adoption agreement any services you feel you may need. Include in home wrap services, Residential Treatment Center (RTC) placement if necessary, make sure you have respite. If nothing else respite can get you through.</p><p></p><p>Consider going to an outside source for a full objective evaluation - a local university hospital is always a good option. They can target any adoptive issues along with any other disorders that may be mixed in here.</p><p></p><p>A time out never ever worked here. What has worked is a time in. That means that instead of sending difficult child away (another separation) that your difficult child would be at your side for an appropriate time. While at your side he would be joining in on any chore you may be working on or sitting quietly while you read the paper, whatever is going on.</p><p></p><p> I wasn't trying to dissuade or discourage you. Rather, I'd like to see you walk into this adoption with eyes wide open & with full knowledge of what you may be dealing with. </p><p></p><p>I love my children - they are the children of my heart.</p><p></p><p>Good luck on your adoption.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="timer lady, post: 77778, member: 393"] Yes, Todd, I've done this times 2 (the tweedles dee & dum, adopted from an abusive/neglectful bio home). I agree with meowbunny in that you are in for the ride of your life if your difficult child has had any abuse issues. Both of my children are diagnosis'd with severe Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD), complex PTSD & bipolar. We are in our 7th year; wm has had 2 Residential Treatment Center (RTC) placements & is currently in long term treament home. His twin sister is here at home but has been in Residential Treatment Center (RTC), along with several hospitalizations & many in home services. Having said that, before you sign on the dotted line negotiate into your adoption agreement any services you feel you may need. Include in home wrap services, Residential Treatment Center (RTC) placement if necessary, make sure you have respite. If nothing else respite can get you through. Consider going to an outside source for a full objective evaluation - a local university hospital is always a good option. They can target any adoptive issues along with any other disorders that may be mixed in here. A time out never ever worked here. What has worked is a time in. That means that instead of sending difficult child away (another separation) that your difficult child would be at your side for an appropriate time. While at your side he would be joining in on any chore you may be working on or sitting quietly while you read the paper, whatever is going on. I wasn't trying to dissuade or discourage you. Rather, I'd like to see you walk into this adoption with eyes wide open & with full knowledge of what you may be dealing with. I love my children - they are the children of my heart. Good luck on your adoption. [/QUOTE]
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9 yr old Oppositional Defiance Disorder with PTSD
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