Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
A Letter to My Son
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="DDD" data-source="post: 105935" data-attributes="member: 35"><p>David, I have read your letter and parts of it seem right on target for bonding with your son. Each of us has to figure the</p><p>best approach in our individual relationships so it isn't really</p><p>possible to "edit" one another's communication.</p><p></p><p>I think all of our teens would get a kick out of the pizza eating</p><p>barfing pet segment. I'm sure all our teens would and do love to</p><p>know hear they are loved and missed.</p><p></p><p>Learning the skills at the Residential Treatment Center (RTC) that will help with life in the home community makes sense, too. If the program allows it, it seems like volunteering to save letters from his peer mentor might be a positive aspect also.</p><p></p><p>My parenting experiences would indicate that for MY family (not</p><p>necessarily your family or anyone else's family) the "preachy"</p><p>parts of the letter would have a negative effect on my teens. The</p><p>intention is totally honorable but the message would not be received in a positive way with either generation of children I</p><p>have raised. My kids would think "does she think I need her to</p><p>explain to me how I screwed up in the past and how I need to avoid it with HER help??" My kids would think "I'm already a</p><p>teenager and I don't want or need a Mommy or a Daddy as my best</p><p>bud or confidant." They also would wonder "is it really up to</p><p>my parent to decide when I am ready to come home? If so, the</p><p>system isn't in charge of me after all...it's just a parent."</p><p></p><p>All of us who have had much loved children in Residential Treatment Center (RTC) have struggled</p><p>with the degree of participation that best fits our difficult child. My son</p><p>has spent years trying to accept his individual responsibility.</p><p>There has never been a New York minute when he didn't completely</p><p>know that we loved him, that we missed him, that we believed he</p><p>could have a wonderful life full of pride and accomplishment.</p><p>difficult children do not want to be clones. They need to find "their" own persona and develop it. That is hard. DDD</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DDD, post: 105935, member: 35"] David, I have read your letter and parts of it seem right on target for bonding with your son. Each of us has to figure the best approach in our individual relationships so it isn't really possible to "edit" one another's communication. I think all of our teens would get a kick out of the pizza eating barfing pet segment. I'm sure all our teens would and do love to know hear they are loved and missed. Learning the skills at the Residential Treatment Center (RTC) that will help with life in the home community makes sense, too. If the program allows it, it seems like volunteering to save letters from his peer mentor might be a positive aspect also. My parenting experiences would indicate that for MY family (not necessarily your family or anyone else's family) the "preachy" parts of the letter would have a negative effect on my teens. The intention is totally honorable but the message would not be received in a positive way with either generation of children I have raised. My kids would think "does she think I need her to explain to me how I screwed up in the past and how I need to avoid it with HER help??" My kids would think "I'm already a teenager and I don't want or need a Mommy or a Daddy as my best bud or confidant." They also would wonder "is it really up to my parent to decide when I am ready to come home? If so, the system isn't in charge of me after all...it's just a parent." All of us who have had much loved children in Residential Treatment Center (RTC) have struggled with the degree of participation that best fits our difficult child. My son has spent years trying to accept his individual responsibility. There has never been a New York minute when he didn't completely know that we loved him, that we missed him, that we believed he could have a wonderful life full of pride and accomplishment. difficult children do not want to be clones. They need to find "their" own persona and develop it. That is hard. DDD [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
A Letter to My Son
Top