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Parent Emeritus
a train wreck already
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<blockquote data-quote="Acacia" data-source="post: 745070" data-attributes="member: 19832"><p>I agree that the car on the street shouldn’t be my problem, but my husband makes it my problem as I said. In some ways he has better boundaries, in others he just makes things more difficult.</p><p></p><p>I am still in the thick of it. Believe it or not, I have been in a 12 step group for codependents and in therapy for 20 years. Can you imagine what I used to be like. That’s what a childhood of abuse/neglect will do for you. I am always more concerned about others - not actually a good trait.</p><p></p><p>My son got his car fixed for now at least. My husband took off for the day, but my DS is coming back to get things of his from our storage for the sober house. No room in his car. This is where my husband is right because it gives him an excuse to come here, but I don’t have the heart to throw what little he has away.</p><p></p><p>The only good thing is that when my DS was blaming me for losing some of his things, when my college son defended me, DS did not escalate or intimidate, which he usually does. He actually de-escalated, a behavior I’ve never seen before from him. The bad, already asked to take a shower here, get warm, a foot in the door. I said no. Hurts, but I did it.</p><p>Feel like s.... Have to go back to teaching high school tomorrow, and I am doing no self-care. Not good.</p><p></p><p>Thanks to everyone, and yes, I gave him phone card.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Acacia, post: 745070, member: 19832"] I agree that the car on the street shouldn’t be my problem, but my husband makes it my problem as I said. In some ways he has better boundaries, in others he just makes things more difficult. I am still in the thick of it. Believe it or not, I have been in a 12 step group for codependents and in therapy for 20 years. Can you imagine what I used to be like. That’s what a childhood of abuse/neglect will do for you. I am always more concerned about others - not actually a good trait. My son got his car fixed for now at least. My husband took off for the day, but my DS is coming back to get things of his from our storage for the sober house. No room in his car. This is where my husband is right because it gives him an excuse to come here, but I don’t have the heart to throw what little he has away. The only good thing is that when my DS was blaming me for losing some of his things, when my college son defended me, DS did not escalate or intimidate, which he usually does. He actually de-escalated, a behavior I’ve never seen before from him. The bad, already asked to take a shower here, get warm, a foot in the door. I said no. Hurts, but I did it. Feel like s.... Have to go back to teaching high school tomorrow, and I am doing no self-care. Not good. Thanks to everyone, and yes, I gave him phone card. [/QUOTE]
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