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Advice needed, In-laws again
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<blockquote data-quote="tiredmommy" data-source="post: 226167" data-attributes="member: 1722"><p>I agree with Fran. You and husband need to stop letting them in on your household's business. You tell them it's not convenient when they want to do something with the girls that is contrary to what they need. End of story. FWIW, I was "too rigid" and "coddling" and "exaggerating" with Duckie's problems. I finally got fed up and told my critics (who were in my family, by the way) that they could keep their opinions to themselves. It was ultimately my responsibility as Duckie's primary caregiver to get her to adulthood in one piece, not theirs. They could be an armchair quarter back to someone else. It caused a lot of resentment and hurt feelings, but they finally backed off. Now, that Duckie is doing better, I hear that I'm a great mother, etc. <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/Graemlins/1010hammer.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":hammer:" title="hammer :hammer:" data-shortname=":hammer:" /> Of course, it's been easier for us because most of Duckie's issues can be attributed to her physical illnesses. I think your inlaws really need to look into their hearts and project how they will feel about their mentally ill granddaughters as adults, because there's a decent chance that the girls' problems will continue well into adulthood. They need to understand that you and husband are in this for the long haul, not just for an afternoon. </p><p> </p><p>{{{Hugs}}} And by the way, I think you are a great mother.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="tiredmommy, post: 226167, member: 1722"] I agree with Fran. You and husband need to stop letting them in on your household's business. You tell them it's not convenient when they want to do something with the girls that is contrary to what they need. End of story. FWIW, I was "too rigid" and "coddling" and "exaggerating" with Duckie's problems. I finally got fed up and told my critics (who were in my family, by the way) that they could keep their opinions to themselves. It was ultimately my responsibility as Duckie's primary caregiver to get her to adulthood in one piece, not theirs. They could be an armchair quarter back to someone else. It caused a lot of resentment and hurt feelings, but they finally backed off. Now, that Duckie is doing better, I hear that I'm a great mother, etc. :hammer: Of course, it's been easier for us because most of Duckie's issues can be attributed to her physical illnesses. I think your inlaws really need to look into their hearts and project how they will feel about their mentally ill granddaughters as adults, because there's a decent chance that the girls' problems will continue well into adulthood. They need to understand that you and husband are in this for the long haul, not just for an afternoon. {{{Hugs}}} And by the way, I think you are a great mother. [/QUOTE]
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Advice needed, In-laws again
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