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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 697925" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Gn, adoption has changed. That was a long time ago.</p><p></p><p>Many adoptees do well in life.</p><p></p><p>Princess was an international adoption, doing great now, very bright, launched, not mentally ill.</p><p></p><p>Jumper was a private adoption birthmother picked us and we knew her I know very few young adults who have the social skills, heart, ambition and high EQ. She is a year from her law enforcement degree. She is remarkably content in her own skin and has never been in trouble in her life.</p><p></p><p>Lucas was a foster/adopt. He has a very high functioning form of autism. We knew the history when we adopted him. I thank my God, the Universe, every day for this brave, hardworking, loving, self sufficient success story He is my hero.</p><p></p><p>Adopted kids, especially older adoptees, tend to do poorly. Older can mean as young as 2. BUT not all adopted kids struggle. My one DNA kid struggles more than all three put together.</p><p></p><p>I am defending adoption as it has lit up my world. But you need to have common sense (obviously I didn't with that one 11 year old boy) and if you have very high expectations school wise I would not do it. We are fine with average IQs and college isn't a must. Most parents of adopted kids were not college graduates. IQ is inherited.</p><p></p><p>Goneboy, though no longer in our lives, had an IQ of 160 and is a millionaire and business owner. He was adopted from an orphanage at 6. Although he had non acting out attachment issues, he certainly achieved and has never been in trouble. In his life, he is successful.</p><p></p><p>You do need to be able to accept average if you adopt, although Princess and Jumper are doing far better than average in life and as people. Much better, especially Jumper.</p><p></p><p>Most of the difficult kids here are biological.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 697925, member: 1550"] Gn, adoption has changed. That was a long time ago. Many adoptees do well in life. Princess was an international adoption, doing great now, very bright, launched, not mentally ill. Jumper was a private adoption birthmother picked us and we knew her I know very few young adults who have the social skills, heart, ambition and high EQ. She is a year from her law enforcement degree. She is remarkably content in her own skin and has never been in trouble in her life. Lucas was a foster/adopt. He has a very high functioning form of autism. We knew the history when we adopted him. I thank my God, the Universe, every day for this brave, hardworking, loving, self sufficient success story He is my hero. Adopted kids, especially older adoptees, tend to do poorly. Older can mean as young as 2. BUT not all adopted kids struggle. My one DNA kid struggles more than all three put together. I am defending adoption as it has lit up my world. But you need to have common sense (obviously I didn't with that one 11 year old boy) and if you have very high expectations school wise I would not do it. We are fine with average IQs and college isn't a must. Most parents of adopted kids were not college graduates. IQ is inherited. Goneboy, though no longer in our lives, had an IQ of 160 and is a millionaire and business owner. He was adopted from an orphanage at 6. Although he had non acting out attachment issues, he certainly achieved and has never been in trouble. In his life, he is successful. You do need to be able to accept average if you adopt, although Princess and Jumper are doing far better than average in life and as people. Much better, especially Jumper. Most of the difficult kids here are biological. [/QUOTE]
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