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<blockquote data-quote="Malika" data-source="post: 432068" data-attributes="member: 11227"><p>Thanks for all those good thoughts. I suspect that J likes the shock value of using these words rather than it being because he can't express himself... But it might be worth asking him to say "I am feeling cross" or "I am feeling frustrated" rather than these outbursts of volatile language... </p><p>Tonight we have some fuss and bother because he has been told he can't go swimming with the rest of the school tomorrow because he has two TINY little spots on his tummy which allegedly are contagious... Seems silly but there you are. He was naturally disappointed and tried to exploit the situation by asking to watch a DVD tonight - our rule is no DVDs or television during the week but only on the weekend. When I said no and wouldn't change for all his pleading, he shouted "I am going to leave you all by yourself! I am going to stay with Daddy in the summer and leave you all by yourself!". Which is really astonishingly manipulative and unpleasant a thing for a small child to say. However I didn't take it personally or get upset! I just said it made me sad to hear him saying such a horrible thing. I wonder, though, what better ways there might be to divert this really unattractive behavioural trait... This is just the sort of adult I do not want him to become, verbally abusive and bullying...</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Malika, post: 432068, member: 11227"] Thanks for all those good thoughts. I suspect that J likes the shock value of using these words rather than it being because he can't express himself... But it might be worth asking him to say "I am feeling cross" or "I am feeling frustrated" rather than these outbursts of volatile language... Tonight we have some fuss and bother because he has been told he can't go swimming with the rest of the school tomorrow because he has two TINY little spots on his tummy which allegedly are contagious... Seems silly but there you are. He was naturally disappointed and tried to exploit the situation by asking to watch a DVD tonight - our rule is no DVDs or television during the week but only on the weekend. When I said no and wouldn't change for all his pleading, he shouted "I am going to leave you all by yourself! I am going to stay with Daddy in the summer and leave you all by yourself!". Which is really astonishingly manipulative and unpleasant a thing for a small child to say. However I didn't take it personally or get upset! I just said it made me sad to hear him saying such a horrible thing. I wonder, though, what better ways there might be to divert this really unattractive behavioural trait... This is just the sort of adult I do not want him to become, verbally abusive and bullying... [/QUOTE]
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