Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
General Discussions
The Watercooler
Allowance for Children
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Mattsmom277" data-source="post: 366081" data-attributes="member: 4264"><p>With my difficult child when he was younger, I started at age 8 and gave until age 12 at the amount of their age (8 years old = $8 etc). I didn't associate it to behaviour (his moods were so nutty he'd NEVER have learned the important lessons of money handling or earning money). I kept it related to doing chores, a very particular list that was small to start and increased a bit each year with a dollar raise at his birthday. If he didn't do his chores, he lost out. Period. He hated losing chore money.</p><p></p><p>With easy child, I have never done allowance. She has her chores and our house now has the rule that we all live here, we all clean. The reward being, a clean home. However, she is allowed to ask me if she can do something additional for money. If its a chore I am willing to give her money for, I say yes. She must do the chore and then I give her x amount of money, but never a preset amount. I have been known to say "heres $5, you worked particularly hard to do a thorough cleaning job, Way To Go". I'm also known to say 'Here's a dollar. I thank you for wanting to earn money without expecting it for nothing. You did the chore and get a dollar. Next time you do this chore, if you are as thorough as you were with (insert other chore here) you might get a bunch more than a dollar". </p><p></p><p>Aside from them being able to offer to do a chore to earn some cash, the philosophy i use for spending money or entertainment money is more of the lines of if they ask, tell me why they want it and they've been really good lately or done something I am uber proud of (great report card or not bickering over homework), they will likely get some money for that activity they need it for. However if they've been awful for some reason and I can't see myself feeling i'm rewarding them, I tell him sorry not this time. I'm really disappointed you'd ask for money for a movie (or whatever) and treats when you've been acting out so much lately. I bet by next weekend though this can all turn around and you can see a movie then.</p><p></p><p>Its all so different for most families. What feels right for you? I'm a believer in not giving kids money if I'm going to feel resentful, and I also believe in trying to find ways that the kids can ensure they can get it (thus my choice to associate it to things other than poor behaviour, for the most part). The poor behaviour part where I say no if the want movie money or something and haven't been doing well, that makes sense for me, not for everyone. They always have the option regardless of their other behaviours, to earn some money by doing a chore and I set the pay right. Sometimes even a bratty behaviour can get a no from me for movie money but a bunch of well done optional chores that they do can earn them the money they wanted.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Mattsmom277, post: 366081, member: 4264"] With my difficult child when he was younger, I started at age 8 and gave until age 12 at the amount of their age (8 years old = $8 etc). I didn't associate it to behaviour (his moods were so nutty he'd NEVER have learned the important lessons of money handling or earning money). I kept it related to doing chores, a very particular list that was small to start and increased a bit each year with a dollar raise at his birthday. If he didn't do his chores, he lost out. Period. He hated losing chore money. With easy child, I have never done allowance. She has her chores and our house now has the rule that we all live here, we all clean. The reward being, a clean home. However, she is allowed to ask me if she can do something additional for money. If its a chore I am willing to give her money for, I say yes. She must do the chore and then I give her x amount of money, but never a preset amount. I have been known to say "heres $5, you worked particularly hard to do a thorough cleaning job, Way To Go". I'm also known to say 'Here's a dollar. I thank you for wanting to earn money without expecting it for nothing. You did the chore and get a dollar. Next time you do this chore, if you are as thorough as you were with (insert other chore here) you might get a bunch more than a dollar". Aside from them being able to offer to do a chore to earn some cash, the philosophy i use for spending money or entertainment money is more of the lines of if they ask, tell me why they want it and they've been really good lately or done something I am uber proud of (great report card or not bickering over homework), they will likely get some money for that activity they need it for. However if they've been awful for some reason and I can't see myself feeling i'm rewarding them, I tell him sorry not this time. I'm really disappointed you'd ask for money for a movie (or whatever) and treats when you've been acting out so much lately. I bet by next weekend though this can all turn around and you can see a movie then. Its all so different for most families. What feels right for you? I'm a believer in not giving kids money if I'm going to feel resentful, and I also believe in trying to find ways that the kids can ensure they can get it (thus my choice to associate it to things other than poor behaviour, for the most part). The poor behaviour part where I say no if the want movie money or something and haven't been doing well, that makes sense for me, not for everyone. They always have the option regardless of their other behaviours, to earn some money by doing a chore and I set the pay right. Sometimes even a bratty behaviour can get a no from me for movie money but a bunch of well done optional chores that they do can earn them the money they wanted. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
General Discussions
The Watercooler
Allowance for Children
Top