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Am I doing the right thing or is this just more enabling?
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<blockquote data-quote="Tanya M" data-source="post: 672147" data-attributes="member: 18516"><p>And this is the hardest part. I remember thinking the same thing with my son, so I paid off his student loans so he wouldn't have ruined credit. He only went to classes for 1 month then lied to me about going and how great school was, then the truth came out and I still allowed myself to be sucked in by paying those loans. 2 years of paying those loans and don't get me started on the cell phone bills!!</p><p></p><p>Sometimes throwing money at a problem does nothing to really solve the problem.</p><p></p><p>I do know there are many success stories of people who turned their lives around because of going to jail.</p><p></p><p>One thing you can do and also get others to do is write a letter. The following is from a site I found on the internet.</p><p>Google "writing letters to the DA, judges, or probation dept."</p><p></p><p><span style="color: #0059b3"><em>If your friend pled guilty to or was convicted of this crime, the best approach would be to contact the Probation Department or the Court Clerk to see if a date has been sent for sentencing. The prosecutor typically has little input in sentencings of misdemeanor cases, but the probation department has quite a bit of input. Since the judge who will sentence your friend does not have time to get to know the facts behind each and every defendant that appears in front of him, he will rely on the probation department to perform a pre-sentence investigative report. This report will not only go into the facts surrounding the crime itself, but may also include results of a substance abuse evaluation if alcohol or drugs were involved, other pyshological evaluations if they were ordered and reference letters submitted by friends and family. The more information the judge has in front of him at sentencing, the better he will be able to hand down a fair/proper sentence. </em></span></p><p><span style="color: #0059b3"></span></p><p><span style="color: #0059b3"><em>So, put together your letter. Make sure to reference how long you've known the defendant, the nature of the relationship [family, friend, employer etc] and then include any information you think may be helpful to the court. Mail it to the Probation Department. They will make sure it becomes</em></span></p><p></p><p>This way you are doing something to help him without draining your savings.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Tanya M, post: 672147, member: 18516"] And this is the hardest part. I remember thinking the same thing with my son, so I paid off his student loans so he wouldn't have ruined credit. He only went to classes for 1 month then lied to me about going and how great school was, then the truth came out and I still allowed myself to be sucked in by paying those loans. 2 years of paying those loans and don't get me started on the cell phone bills!! Sometimes throwing money at a problem does nothing to really solve the problem. I do know there are many success stories of people who turned their lives around because of going to jail. One thing you can do and also get others to do is write a letter. The following is from a site I found on the internet. Google "writing letters to the DA, judges, or probation dept." [COLOR=#0059b3][I]If your friend pled guilty to or was convicted of this crime, the best approach would be to contact the Probation Department or the Court Clerk to see if a date has been sent for sentencing. The prosecutor typically has little input in sentencings of misdemeanor cases, but the probation department has quite a bit of input. Since the judge who will sentence your friend does not have time to get to know the facts behind each and every defendant that appears in front of him, he will rely on the probation department to perform a pre-sentence investigative report. This report will not only go into the facts surrounding the crime itself, but may also include results of a substance abuse evaluation if alcohol or drugs were involved, other pyshological evaluations if they were ordered and reference letters submitted by friends and family. The more information the judge has in front of him at sentencing, the better he will be able to hand down a fair/proper sentence. [/I] [I]So, put together your letter. Make sure to reference how long you've known the defendant, the nature of the relationship [family, friend, employer etc] and then include any information you think may be helpful to the court. Mail it to the Probation Department. They will make sure it becomes[/I][/COLOR] This way you are doing something to help him without draining your savings. [/QUOTE]
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Am I doing the right thing or is this just more enabling?
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