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Parent Emeritus
Am I steering my own, true course or heading for the rocks?
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<blockquote data-quote="Littleboylost" data-source="post: 743092" data-attributes="member: 21895"><p>Hi Copa </p><p></p><p>Sorry I have been MIS for so long. I am just catching up. </p><p></p><p>It would be so tempting to be pias and play the pontiff here; and I know that would be me gong into th defence mode to protect you and your heart from more pain and disappointments. </p><p></p><p>I read the most beautiful post on another site some time ago from a mother of a young homeless drug addicted daughter. She somehow got to the point that she accepted that she could not help her daughter nor enable her. And yet could not simply extricate her from her life. </p><p></p><p>She took weeks to find her daughter and she was living in a tent city in untold conditions. She embraced her daughter and invited her for a meal. They ate and she provided some needed provisions to her daughter, they embraced and she left. She referred to this engagement as learning to love her daughter here she was at. Having hope with no expectations and embracing what she could and letting go of what she could not control. This still makes me very weepy when I think of this. It makes me so emotional because I think this is the strongest thing a parent could ever do. </p><p></p><p>It helped me to engage with E towards the end of his active use with more calm in my heats and less pain that I had endured before. It is finding a way to ground oneself in the painful unknown that we can not control. In Naranon terms it is what it is. </p><p></p><p>How we get from hell to here is the hard part. If you asked me how I got there myself I am not sure I could answer. I do send you strength and hope you do find so peace and calm. </p><p></p><p>Let us know how your meeting turns out.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Littleboylost, post: 743092, member: 21895"] Hi Copa Sorry I have been MIS for so long. I am just catching up. It would be so tempting to be pias and play the pontiff here; and I know that would be me gong into th defence mode to protect you and your heart from more pain and disappointments. I read the most beautiful post on another site some time ago from a mother of a young homeless drug addicted daughter. She somehow got to the point that she accepted that she could not help her daughter nor enable her. And yet could not simply extricate her from her life. She took weeks to find her daughter and she was living in a tent city in untold conditions. She embraced her daughter and invited her for a meal. They ate and she provided some needed provisions to her daughter, they embraced and she left. She referred to this engagement as learning to love her daughter here she was at. Having hope with no expectations and embracing what she could and letting go of what she could not control. This still makes me very weepy when I think of this. It makes me so emotional because I think this is the strongest thing a parent could ever do. It helped me to engage with E towards the end of his active use with more calm in my heats and less pain that I had endured before. It is finding a way to ground oneself in the painful unknown that we can not control. In Naranon terms it is what it is. How we get from hell to here is the hard part. If you asked me how I got there myself I am not sure I could answer. I do send you strength and hope you do find so peace and calm. Let us know how your meeting turns out. [/QUOTE]
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Am I steering my own, true course or heading for the rocks?
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