I'm gonna pass along some of the assurance and comfort that I got on this board a few days ago when I posted a similar question.
YOU are the mom. YOU are with the child every day. YOU know what is necessary to keep him in line. You are doing the right things by getting him help and reading the suggested book.
difficult children ALWAYS save their difficult child-ness for the person that they feel safest with. Usually, mom. Of course he acts differently around mom. And mom might not understand that.
Encourage her to read the book when you are finished. And do not be so hard on yourself. Sounds like you are doing a fine job.
Hugs and prayers coming your way.
