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And she's pregnant again
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 744443" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>You dont sound selfish at all. You sound like you know you cant do it, that she has to do it. That is simply reality. I would be furious. Is your daughter paying rent? Helping around rhe house? If she were mine, she would probably have been told to go on Section 8 years ago. You have to be cramped and going broke and you matter!</p><p></p><p>If your daughter chooses to have another child its HER child. I think you are my age...told me in another post... And for me at least this is MY time now. I would not try to raise another child, not even an older one, and certainly not a baby at my age. And I dont have any health problems other than I am 65 and am not going to push myself anymore. Its not good for you to keep pretending you are 34. You will get ill. Your daughter needs to step up. HAS to.</p><p></p><p>First of all do not allow Baby Daddy to sleep under your roof, even overnight. Just in case she asks. Its YOUR space. He would just be a freeloader. Your daughter is old enough to deal with "No. Not here."</p><p></p><p>Secondly your daughter should apply for WIC, a foodcard, Medicaid and welfare and live on what she is given. There are local charities and food pantries too. She can get on the list for Section 8 Housing if she insists on living with this newest honey. She needs a place to live longterm anyway. Better to be prepared.</p><p></p><p>If you take care of her further, what will stop her from having more babies that she expects you to raise at age 70? You cant live forever. Who will take care of her and the kids if you get very sick or when you are gone? You do her no favors by not teaching her to live on her own, because that is where she will end up and its best if she is used to it.</p><p></p><p>Please stop thinking you have to take care of the stupid things your kids do. Your daughter is taking no steps to improve her life situation, and society doesnt give a rat's arse if she is immature. Since she is not improving her life at all (just the opposite) it is best she learns how to navigate the system of government assistance NOW, while you are still around to advise her where to go and what to do in order to apply for various services. She will whine that it is "hard." But she must do it and learn, for the time when she has nobody but herself and her kids. She will need to be on assistance.</p><p></p><p>I am very sorry that your daughter made such a selfish choice, one that will not be good for anyone. All you can do is either take on full resonsibility and leave her clueless when you are no longer here, or you can tell her where to get assistance from and make her get it by not helping her. She will need tougher treatment than your help for the longterm.</p><p></p><p>Please take good care of yourself. And by the way I would never tell my daughter I was happy she had gotten pregnant again with a man without a decent job and with few life skills of her own. I would probably start telling her what she will have to do to support them...because the Bank of Mom is closed. Unless I were tremendously wealthy, which I am not.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 744443, member: 1550"] You dont sound selfish at all. You sound like you know you cant do it, that she has to do it. That is simply reality. I would be furious. Is your daughter paying rent? Helping around rhe house? If she were mine, she would probably have been told to go on Section 8 years ago. You have to be cramped and going broke and you matter! If your daughter chooses to have another child its HER child. I think you are my age...told me in another post... And for me at least this is MY time now. I would not try to raise another child, not even an older one, and certainly not a baby at my age. And I dont have any health problems other than I am 65 and am not going to push myself anymore. Its not good for you to keep pretending you are 34. You will get ill. Your daughter needs to step up. HAS to. First of all do not allow Baby Daddy to sleep under your roof, even overnight. Just in case she asks. Its YOUR space. He would just be a freeloader. Your daughter is old enough to deal with "No. Not here." Secondly your daughter should apply for WIC, a foodcard, Medicaid and welfare and live on what she is given. There are local charities and food pantries too. She can get on the list for Section 8 Housing if she insists on living with this newest honey. She needs a place to live longterm anyway. Better to be prepared. If you take care of her further, what will stop her from having more babies that she expects you to raise at age 70? You cant live forever. Who will take care of her and the kids if you get very sick or when you are gone? You do her no favors by not teaching her to live on her own, because that is where she will end up and its best if she is used to it. Please stop thinking you have to take care of the stupid things your kids do. Your daughter is taking no steps to improve her life situation, and society doesnt give a rat's arse if she is immature. Since she is not improving her life at all (just the opposite) it is best she learns how to navigate the system of government assistance NOW, while you are still around to advise her where to go and what to do in order to apply for various services. She will whine that it is "hard." But she must do it and learn, for the time when she has nobody but herself and her kids. She will need to be on assistance. I am very sorry that your daughter made such a selfish choice, one that will not be good for anyone. All you can do is either take on full resonsibility and leave her clueless when you are no longer here, or you can tell her where to get assistance from and make her get it by not helping her. She will need tougher treatment than your help for the longterm. Please take good care of yourself. And by the way I would never tell my daughter I was happy she had gotten pregnant again with a man without a decent job and with few life skills of her own. I would probably start telling her what she will have to do to support them...because the Bank of Mom is closed. Unless I were tremendously wealthy, which I am not. [/QUOTE]
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