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Another bout with letting go..........
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<blockquote data-quote="Childofmine" data-source="post: 619418" data-attributes="member: 17542"><p>RE, what a beautiful and revealing post. You really described another level in the process of recovery and detachment I believe. </p><p></p><p>It is so worth it to have even a glimpse, a taste, of this deep calm, contentment, as you said---vulnerability, and I would also say assurance that all will be well.</p><p></p><p>I like the term "cracked open" that you use. There is a deep soft place inside us that is the place of peace. </p><p></p><p>We could have hardened ourselves against the suffering of this. We could now be hard-hearted toward ourselves, our difficult children and to everybody, because the world is and can be such a tough, tough place and this journey can be pain-filled. Oh, the pain we have all endured just with our difficult children for how long? For so long, it seems.</p><p></p><p>Not to mention the other challenges, difficulties, disappointments, losses, failures of "normal life." What we are doing with our difficult children is way, way outside a "normal life." </p><p></p><p>And so we had/have two choices---stay deep in the disease with them and continue down the road titled Enabling. Or, turn. And go in a different direction, the road called Recovery. And then there would be at least two forks in that road---the toughening road or the gentling road. </p><p></p><p>I want to have a tender, open heart with the ability to gently, kindly say No. No is a complete sentence but there are ways to say No filled with anger, judgment and contempt. I have done that. I don't like myself when that I my choice. </p><p></p><p>I believe that what you describe, RE, is the gentling road. We are learning to accept what is with gratitude and with compassion, and to then claim our own lives, with love for ourselves and for our difficult children and all others. </p><p></p><p>This hard, hard work to get to this place, this clearing on the journey, is such a gift. I believe it is from God and it is bringing us to where He envisioned we could be all along. This is what he envisions for all people. I wonder how many get there or even get to stop for a while there. </p><p></p><p>Who knows what is next? I have learned that this journey comes in fits and starts, and there will be more hard places, tough places, stints on the tough road---necessary ones---ahead. But I want to spend more time and stay on the gentling road, and I hope I can.</p><p></p><p>thank you for your beautiful words, so descriptive and so appealing. Prayers and blessings for you and all of us today.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Childofmine, post: 619418, member: 17542"] RE, what a beautiful and revealing post. You really described another level in the process of recovery and detachment I believe. It is so worth it to have even a glimpse, a taste, of this deep calm, contentment, as you said---vulnerability, and I would also say assurance that all will be well. I like the term "cracked open" that you use. There is a deep soft place inside us that is the place of peace. We could have hardened ourselves against the suffering of this. We could now be hard-hearted toward ourselves, our difficult children and to everybody, because the world is and can be such a tough, tough place and this journey can be pain-filled. Oh, the pain we have all endured just with our difficult children for how long? For so long, it seems. Not to mention the other challenges, difficulties, disappointments, losses, failures of "normal life." What we are doing with our difficult children is way, way outside a "normal life." And so we had/have two choices---stay deep in the disease with them and continue down the road titled Enabling. Or, turn. And go in a different direction, the road called Recovery. And then there would be at least two forks in that road---the toughening road or the gentling road. I want to have a tender, open heart with the ability to gently, kindly say No. No is a complete sentence but there are ways to say No filled with anger, judgment and contempt. I have done that. I don't like myself when that I my choice. I believe that what you describe, RE, is the gentling road. We are learning to accept what is with gratitude and with compassion, and to then claim our own lives, with love for ourselves and for our difficult children and all others. This hard, hard work to get to this place, this clearing on the journey, is such a gift. I believe it is from God and it is bringing us to where He envisioned we could be all along. This is what he envisions for all people. I wonder how many get there or even get to stop for a while there. Who knows what is next? I have learned that this journey comes in fits and starts, and there will be more hard places, tough places, stints on the tough road---necessary ones---ahead. But I want to spend more time and stay on the gentling road, and I hope I can. thank you for your beautiful words, so descriptive and so appealing. Prayers and blessings for you and all of us today. [/QUOTE]
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Another bout with letting go..........
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