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Another day.... another promise?
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<blockquote data-quote="ColleenB" data-source="post: 711855" data-attributes="member: 19887"><p>He came to me yesterday with 230$ of the 250$ deposit. I paid it online for him, because he said he tried on Friday but they told him to go online. I do believe him. He used 20$ for a cab so he was a bit short.</p><p></p><p>I decided to go ahead and help him with that. He was in a bit of a tense mood yesterday and told us he hates living with us and wants to move out.... I told him we love him but feel the same way. It's not fun for us either.</p><p></p><p>Hoping he gets a legit job soon that lets him afford to move out again. His current job is in a garage under the table and isn't reliable. Heck I'm not covinced it's not working for some Hells Angels! Anyway.... if he is in the drug trade still, which I hope he isn't, he isn't making much. But maybe we are blind and he is conning us again... I would never say never.</p><p></p><p>I think it is a positive he wants to go to Art school. Even if all it does is give him a year to get his head on straight and start to feel better about himself I think it is a good idea. Husband the engineer who has always pushed univ and the sciences/math is on board. After the last few years he just wants to see him more stable and happy. We both have gotten over the univ dream... well, most days. I still get a punch to the gut as I see his friends graduate univ and make successful lives for themselves.... it is all so unreal. This was not a kid who didn't do well in school, all As in high school and captain of his sports teams. He never had a detention or bad teacher comment his entire school career. When I see young mums brag up their kids on Facebook, I feel like yelling "it doesn't always go as planned!"</p><p></p><p>I know it's pathetic to even think like that... but honestly.. we did NOT see this coming with this kid at all. He was the model kid until he hit 19. And we had a good relationship... no fighting or drama at all. Younger son was a pain as a toddler, tempermental, hated school as he went through.... not really a trouble maker, more lazy and unmotivated.... silly and class clown. We thought that was tough! We had no idea what was coming! Now youngest seems on track,working full time to save up for forestry school... he has never borrowed a dime and pays all his own fees and tuition. Finally he is motivated because he is excited about school for the first time!</p><p></p><p>We are so thankful he seems to be on track. I'm not worried about him... he knows how to pay bills and work full time. What else can we expect really... and he is only just 19. Our boys seem to have decided to give us a hard time at both ends.... oh well!</p><p></p><p>Trying to stay positive for all our futures.... but it's like I'm scared older son is still deep in the drug world and I am just blind to it.... maybe I need to be right now, as long as he isn't driving our cars and there is none in my house... what else can I do??? I have no proof.... it's more a deep deep fear. And maybe some mom intuition.</p><p></p><p>If I'm being totally honest.... I often wonder if the garage job is a front. And maybe he is still in it. He had changed in some big ways.... not strung out anymore, not as angry, planning for his future....but I feel a little nag that it isn't all over yet.... the out all night often, the money for his deposit ( which he could have borrowed from his brother... he wouldn't tell on him) I don't know.... maybe I am just paranoid. There is nothing in the house, we have cleaned the basement twice now looking.</p><p></p><p>Sigh.... I wish I had a crystal ball.....</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="ColleenB, post: 711855, member: 19887"] He came to me yesterday with 230$ of the 250$ deposit. I paid it online for him, because he said he tried on Friday but they told him to go online. I do believe him. He used 20$ for a cab so he was a bit short. I decided to go ahead and help him with that. He was in a bit of a tense mood yesterday and told us he hates living with us and wants to move out.... I told him we love him but feel the same way. It's not fun for us either. Hoping he gets a legit job soon that lets him afford to move out again. His current job is in a garage under the table and isn't reliable. Heck I'm not covinced it's not working for some Hells Angels! Anyway.... if he is in the drug trade still, which I hope he isn't, he isn't making much. But maybe we are blind and he is conning us again... I would never say never. I think it is a positive he wants to go to Art school. Even if all it does is give him a year to get his head on straight and start to feel better about himself I think it is a good idea. Husband the engineer who has always pushed univ and the sciences/math is on board. After the last few years he just wants to see him more stable and happy. We both have gotten over the univ dream... well, most days. I still get a punch to the gut as I see his friends graduate univ and make successful lives for themselves.... it is all so unreal. This was not a kid who didn't do well in school, all As in high school and captain of his sports teams. He never had a detention or bad teacher comment his entire school career. When I see young mums brag up their kids on Facebook, I feel like yelling "it doesn't always go as planned!" I know it's pathetic to even think like that... but honestly.. we did NOT see this coming with this kid at all. He was the model kid until he hit 19. And we had a good relationship... no fighting or drama at all. Younger son was a pain as a toddler, tempermental, hated school as he went through.... not really a trouble maker, more lazy and unmotivated.... silly and class clown. We thought that was tough! We had no idea what was coming! Now youngest seems on track,working full time to save up for forestry school... he has never borrowed a dime and pays all his own fees and tuition. Finally he is motivated because he is excited about school for the first time! We are so thankful he seems to be on track. I'm not worried about him... he knows how to pay bills and work full time. What else can we expect really... and he is only just 19. Our boys seem to have decided to give us a hard time at both ends.... oh well! Trying to stay positive for all our futures.... but it's like I'm scared older son is still deep in the drug world and I am just blind to it.... maybe I need to be right now, as long as he isn't driving our cars and there is none in my house... what else can I do??? I have no proof.... it's more a deep deep fear. And maybe some mom intuition. If I'm being totally honest.... I often wonder if the garage job is a front. And maybe he is still in it. He had changed in some big ways.... not strung out anymore, not as angry, planning for his future....but I feel a little nag that it isn't all over yet.... the out all night often, the money for his deposit ( which he could have borrowed from his brother... he wouldn't tell on him) I don't know.... maybe I am just paranoid. There is nothing in the house, we have cleaned the basement twice now looking. Sigh.... I wish I had a crystal ball..... [/QUOTE]
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