Thanks both. As I say, I know if I were in a big city things would be a lot better and I am sure there are OTs in France who know more about sensory things - but I simply could not get to them on a regular basis. Wednesdays (no school) would be the only day and that is already fully occupied with his seeing the psychomotricien and his various sporting activities, which he enjoys and which are surely good for him.
One more small avenue opens up... last year all the kids were visited by a doctor (they visit all 4 year olds in this way) who referred us for more help as J was so manically hyperactive when he saw her (anxiety, new situation). Anyway, they asked the teacher if any of the 5/6 year olds needed continuing attention, she said to me as far as she was concerned he is fine but did I want to take up the possibility? I said yes, so we are seeing this doctor... yet another one... next Monday. Who knows, it will lead somewhere concrete or at least mean that we are on the radar, in a sense.
Don't know what J's sensory issues are. He seems very sensitive to noise and taste. Not so much the feel of clothes, etc, to which he doesn't seem particularly sensitive. Does it relate to the hyperactivity? Just don't know.
