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Antisocial Personality Disorder Diagnosis of my 18 year old son
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 432247" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>Star's wisdom is excellent. She truly has experience many of us do NOT. PLEASE be aware that during the process of getting them out of your home and/or away from you, an abuser is the MOST dangerous. They sense their control over you is slipping and they are quite likely to do extraordinary things. Make double darn sure that your son knows that if ANYTHING happens to you, even a hangnail, that you WILL press charges. And I would leave a letter with someone that you trust stating that he has ASPD and has been abusive to you for a long time and if anything happens to you the authorities need to take a long, hard look at him. I am NOT exaggerating. It seems melodramatic, but with someone with aspd you just cannot be too careful. The decent into becoming a sociopath is just too fast. Some people say that aspd means they are sociopaths - that there is not difference. I do NOT know if this is true, but I guess it depends on how you use those words.</p><p></p><p>Find out what the police will do to help. You are going to need them. IF he damages anything you can have him arrested for destruction of property and then offer to drop the charges if he will just GO. Be SURE to change the locks that same night - all of them. Keep the windows locked at all times. If you have a security system, change it. If you have a garage door opener, get it back from him, keep the door to the garage LOCKED at all times, and if he still gets in through the garage door, find out how to change the frequency it uses. Sadly there are only a few different frequencies for all the garage openers made, like five of them. Not kidding. Used to have a blast driving up and down neighborhoods watching doors open and close - and I will NEVER have one of those openers on my home!</p><p></p><p>When he cries no where to go, hungry, whatever, give him a list of shelters and soup kitchens and food pantries. Just google your area and homeless shelter, and your area and soup kitchens. Make a list on the computer, print a couple of copies and every time he tries that **** he gets a copy of the list. He will find friends to sponge off of, and if you are tough enough, eventually he might even find a job and make a life. </p><p></p><p>But YOU have to go live YOUR life. Get involved in something that interests you. go and do things. Keep your home locked up tight, your cars too. If he damges any property - call the cops. Have your neighbors do the same. What he does is NOT your responsibility any more. period. If you pay for his phone, clothes, anything, that needs to stop. If youw ant to talk to him often, keep the phone activated, or give him a cheap pay as you go phone and a card with some minutes. Be aware that if you are paying for ANYTHINg he will believe that he can get you to pay for EVERYTHING. And he will try to bully you into it. So cutting the money totally is a much better things for your safety.</p><p></p><p>Iknow when my parents finally tossed my gfgbro out it was terribly hard on them. He joined the army because he knew he couldn't live the way he wanted on what he could earn - esp as he was totally unwilling to work a regular job where you have a boss that tells you what to do and how to do it and you have to be there at a certain timea nd stay to a certain time. Not sure why he thought the Army would not be like that, lol, but he lasted two years. I hope that you can get him out safely (for both of you) and then you can go and find things you enjoy to do wtih yourself.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 432247, member: 1233"] Star's wisdom is excellent. She truly has experience many of us do NOT. PLEASE be aware that during the process of getting them out of your home and/or away from you, an abuser is the MOST dangerous. They sense their control over you is slipping and they are quite likely to do extraordinary things. Make double darn sure that your son knows that if ANYTHING happens to you, even a hangnail, that you WILL press charges. And I would leave a letter with someone that you trust stating that he has ASPD and has been abusive to you for a long time and if anything happens to you the authorities need to take a long, hard look at him. I am NOT exaggerating. It seems melodramatic, but with someone with aspd you just cannot be too careful. The decent into becoming a sociopath is just too fast. Some people say that aspd means they are sociopaths - that there is not difference. I do NOT know if this is true, but I guess it depends on how you use those words. Find out what the police will do to help. You are going to need them. IF he damages anything you can have him arrested for destruction of property and then offer to drop the charges if he will just GO. Be SURE to change the locks that same night - all of them. Keep the windows locked at all times. If you have a security system, change it. If you have a garage door opener, get it back from him, keep the door to the garage LOCKED at all times, and if he still gets in through the garage door, find out how to change the frequency it uses. Sadly there are only a few different frequencies for all the garage openers made, like five of them. Not kidding. Used to have a blast driving up and down neighborhoods watching doors open and close - and I will NEVER have one of those openers on my home! When he cries no where to go, hungry, whatever, give him a list of shelters and soup kitchens and food pantries. Just google your area and homeless shelter, and your area and soup kitchens. Make a list on the computer, print a couple of copies and every time he tries that **** he gets a copy of the list. He will find friends to sponge off of, and if you are tough enough, eventually he might even find a job and make a life. But YOU have to go live YOUR life. Get involved in something that interests you. go and do things. Keep your home locked up tight, your cars too. If he damges any property - call the cops. Have your neighbors do the same. What he does is NOT your responsibility any more. period. If you pay for his phone, clothes, anything, that needs to stop. If youw ant to talk to him often, keep the phone activated, or give him a cheap pay as you go phone and a card with some minutes. Be aware that if you are paying for ANYTHINg he will believe that he can get you to pay for EVERYTHING. And he will try to bully you into it. So cutting the money totally is a much better things for your safety. Iknow when my parents finally tossed my gfgbro out it was terribly hard on them. He joined the army because he knew he couldn't live the way he wanted on what he could earn - esp as he was totally unwilling to work a regular job where you have a boss that tells you what to do and how to do it and you have to be there at a certain timea nd stay to a certain time. Not sure why he thought the Army would not be like that, lol, but he lasted two years. I hope that you can get him out safely (for both of you) and then you can go and find things you enjoy to do wtih yourself. [/QUOTE]
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Antisocial Personality Disorder Diagnosis of my 18 year old son
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