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Anyone else dealing with a pathological/compulsive liar?
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 429247" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>I just want to send hugs. The lies you describe, esp about things that didn't take place that don't serve any purpose like getting you out of trouble or someone else into trouble, remind me of a jr high classmate. This girl, KC I will call her, told the most unbelievable, outrageous lies - things that no one would ever believe. Like the CIA coming to her house to get her to help get secrets for a spy and then smuggle him out of the country - and she couldn't tell her parents or get their help with any of it. This was the first one I heard and was just so far fetched that it was all I could do to stare. We were 13 at the time. For a long time we all thought she told these lies for attention. If someone commented on a song or artist then the artist was so thankful for her help with something or an idea she gave them or how she inspired them that the artist wrote a song just for her and gave her the rights to it. Of course no one ever heard the song because she was keeping it all to herself, refusing to let it be recorded so it would be special just for her. Or there was a huge bidding war for the song between several top artists and she was going to spend the summer with the one who wins the rights so she can make sure they record it "right". This was back in the days of the band Wham and seh KNEW that the artists were not gay because they hit on her = but of course she didn't do anything with them because she was a "good girl", but they were heartbroken because she said no. Those were the more believable of her stories. I know several people spoke to her parents about them, simply because they were SO crazy and she truly seemed to believe some of them. That was the part that alarmed many of us that knew her. </p><p></p><p>Her parents moved her to a small private school when their church opened one, but the people who she still saw said that the lies kept coming. The change was that they became religious in nature and even more delusional. By high school her parents were at their wit's end to figure out what was going on (this was the 80s and Oklahoma didn't have children's hospitals or even many psychiatrists/tdocs who treated kids like this at that time). I lost track after that but I won't ever forget feeling so sad that she felt she had to have these lies as part of her life. I know that one teacher was so worried she started keeping track of the various lies and how she would change them when challenged on any of the facts (things like how did you get this person out of the country through NY when you were at school on Friday and at the game on Sat and in church on Sun and in school on Mon?). This one teacher tried to get her to recognize them as fantasy and work to write them as short stories or books, or even to dictate them to someone as stories. But ANY challenge to the reality of the lie would send KC into near hysterics. That was what scared so many of us.</p><p></p><p>I wish I could say things changed. A friend recently posted on facebook that she ran into KC about a year ago and her various stories are still being spun. </p><p></p><p>I hope that your daughter can accept her own special qualities and give up the idea that she has to have all of these things to make her special and interesting to others. I think that you will need a very experienced therapist and psychiatrist and possibly a neuropsychologist to help unravel the whys of this problem and to help her find solutions that work better than the lies. So many times KC sat at lunch near us and people were so hesitant to speak to her because almost anything could get her to tell you some crazy lie.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 429247, member: 1233"] I just want to send hugs. The lies you describe, esp about things that didn't take place that don't serve any purpose like getting you out of trouble or someone else into trouble, remind me of a jr high classmate. This girl, KC I will call her, told the most unbelievable, outrageous lies - things that no one would ever believe. Like the CIA coming to her house to get her to help get secrets for a spy and then smuggle him out of the country - and she couldn't tell her parents or get their help with any of it. This was the first one I heard and was just so far fetched that it was all I could do to stare. We were 13 at the time. For a long time we all thought she told these lies for attention. If someone commented on a song or artist then the artist was so thankful for her help with something or an idea she gave them or how she inspired them that the artist wrote a song just for her and gave her the rights to it. Of course no one ever heard the song because she was keeping it all to herself, refusing to let it be recorded so it would be special just for her. Or there was a huge bidding war for the song between several top artists and she was going to spend the summer with the one who wins the rights so she can make sure they record it "right". This was back in the days of the band Wham and seh KNEW that the artists were not gay because they hit on her = but of course she didn't do anything with them because she was a "good girl", but they were heartbroken because she said no. Those were the more believable of her stories. I know several people spoke to her parents about them, simply because they were SO crazy and she truly seemed to believe some of them. That was the part that alarmed many of us that knew her. Her parents moved her to a small private school when their church opened one, but the people who she still saw said that the lies kept coming. The change was that they became religious in nature and even more delusional. By high school her parents were at their wit's end to figure out what was going on (this was the 80s and Oklahoma didn't have children's hospitals or even many psychiatrists/tdocs who treated kids like this at that time). I lost track after that but I won't ever forget feeling so sad that she felt she had to have these lies as part of her life. I know that one teacher was so worried she started keeping track of the various lies and how she would change them when challenged on any of the facts (things like how did you get this person out of the country through NY when you were at school on Friday and at the game on Sat and in church on Sun and in school on Mon?). This one teacher tried to get her to recognize them as fantasy and work to write them as short stories or books, or even to dictate them to someone as stories. But ANY challenge to the reality of the lie would send KC into near hysterics. That was what scared so many of us. I wish I could say things changed. A friend recently posted on facebook that she ran into KC about a year ago and her various stories are still being spun. I hope that your daughter can accept her own special qualities and give up the idea that she has to have all of these things to make her special and interesting to others. I think that you will need a very experienced therapist and psychiatrist and possibly a neuropsychologist to help unravel the whys of this problem and to help her find solutions that work better than the lies. So many times KC sat at lunch near us and people were so hesitant to speak to her because almost anything could get her to tell you some crazy lie. [/QUOTE]
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Anyone else dealing with a pathological/compulsive liar?
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