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Anyone else feeling like they want to do away with their child sometimes?
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<blockquote data-quote="MuM_of_OCD_kiddo" data-source="post: 459482" data-attributes="member: 12241"><p>Crystal - maybe it's time for a new psychiatrist??? </p><p></p><p>If I hate something it is when I am being patronized by a professional [regardless of the profession], like I am not all the way grownup and live with this stuff every day or know what I am talking about? Sometimes I wonder if some of them truly understand what we are dealing with when we have difficult children in our home. And being depressed??? I bet most parents of difficult children are depressed - what else [other than maybe oblivious] can you be when you have to deal with these issues? And if it is not the difficult child itself - then it's the teachers, aids, para's, case workers, professionals and the rest of the world that looks at us as if something is wrong with us for producing or creating difficult children.</p><p></p><p>'nough of that - the next time you get disparaging remarks, send difficult child out of the room, put your foot down, make eye contact and let him/her have a bit of your mind. And if s/he still thinks you are depressed, or unstable or whatever - I suggest you find a new one. I would also seperate your issues from your difficult children issues if you also see a therapist [go for different ones for both of you!]. </p><p></p><p>I think it is important that you stand firm with your difficult child now - this is about the last chance to establish respect before puberty hits - and those are a tough 3-4 years you are a looking at, and it doesn't matter if difficult child is male or female - each set has their own sex related growing pains to deal with. You'll definitely have a headstart if they have a healthy respect for you starting out with, not to say that you will not get challenged, buttons pushed, tested and gone on your everlasting last nerve, LOL. Hugs and hang in there, MuM</p><p></p><p>PS.: In rereading and checking for typos - a thought just came to mind. During the last 2 or so years, my son has always found it extremely interesting when I have "a cow", LOL. I am a pretty laid back and mellow person, but only so far - especially if it is for services I am paying for [single parent here and my business is definitely economy challenged, to be polite]. I'm not sure if he loves it when someone else is at the other end of me sharing my opinions and giving them a bit of my mind, or if he is taking notes for future deportment, LOL. But I did notice - while he was going through his slow changes to the better, whenever he has seen or heard me or read something I wrote in this regard, the respect level for me would rise. To me = retroactively mulling this over, as I never thought about this until just now - it seems the more he sees me in control and not taking any s*** from others [and I am not talking about yelling, hollering or loosing it - but polite, firm and direct opposition and insisting that mistakes are corrected or that the services I pay for are done to a satisfying level] the less ornery he got and the less he felt the need to push my buttons. Correspondingly - when he disagrees with something - he has become quieter and less aggressive when making his point - but calmly insisting on it instead of having a temper tantrum. He has also learned not to do impulse gut reactions, but to walk away and think about it and then come back later to discuss it or to plead his case. Maybe he picked something up by example after all, but then again he is older and more mature than your younger children... I gotta think about this some more.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="MuM_of_OCD_kiddo, post: 459482, member: 12241"] Crystal - maybe it's time for a new psychiatrist??? If I hate something it is when I am being patronized by a professional [regardless of the profession], like I am not all the way grownup and live with this stuff every day or know what I am talking about? Sometimes I wonder if some of them truly understand what we are dealing with when we have difficult children in our home. And being depressed??? I bet most parents of difficult children are depressed - what else [other than maybe oblivious] can you be when you have to deal with these issues? And if it is not the difficult child itself - then it's the teachers, aids, para's, case workers, professionals and the rest of the world that looks at us as if something is wrong with us for producing or creating difficult children. 'nough of that - the next time you get disparaging remarks, send difficult child out of the room, put your foot down, make eye contact and let him/her have a bit of your mind. And if s/he still thinks you are depressed, or unstable or whatever - I suggest you find a new one. I would also seperate your issues from your difficult children issues if you also see a therapist [go for different ones for both of you!]. I think it is important that you stand firm with your difficult child now - this is about the last chance to establish respect before puberty hits - and those are a tough 3-4 years you are a looking at, and it doesn't matter if difficult child is male or female - each set has their own sex related growing pains to deal with. You'll definitely have a headstart if they have a healthy respect for you starting out with, not to say that you will not get challenged, buttons pushed, tested and gone on your everlasting last nerve, LOL. Hugs and hang in there, MuM PS.: In rereading and checking for typos - a thought just came to mind. During the last 2 or so years, my son has always found it extremely interesting when I have "a cow", LOL. I am a pretty laid back and mellow person, but only so far - especially if it is for services I am paying for [single parent here and my business is definitely economy challenged, to be polite]. I'm not sure if he loves it when someone else is at the other end of me sharing my opinions and giving them a bit of my mind, or if he is taking notes for future deportment, LOL. But I did notice - while he was going through his slow changes to the better, whenever he has seen or heard me or read something I wrote in this regard, the respect level for me would rise. To me = retroactively mulling this over, as I never thought about this until just now - it seems the more he sees me in control and not taking any s*** from others [and I am not talking about yelling, hollering or loosing it - but polite, firm and direct opposition and insisting that mistakes are corrected or that the services I pay for are done to a satisfying level] the less ornery he got and the less he felt the need to push my buttons. Correspondingly - when he disagrees with something - he has become quieter and less aggressive when making his point - but calmly insisting on it instead of having a temper tantrum. He has also learned not to do impulse gut reactions, but to walk away and think about it and then come back later to discuss it or to plead his case. Maybe he picked something up by example after all, but then again he is older and more mature than your younger children... I gotta think about this some more. [/QUOTE]
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Anyone else feeling like they want to do away with their child sometimes?
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