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General Parenting
Anyone here have awful "support" from your parents?
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<blockquote data-quote="Ropefree" data-source="post: 213481" data-attributes="member: 6271"><p>Our mothers do give us the tools to love by loving us...after that we become adults and although our mothers relationship is where it is we are now indiviguals and seperate.</p><p>ANd older women think alot differantly than what people do now. </p><p>Maybe you think this one through yourself and with your sister identify what it is that can help...including, perhaps, how to direct Mom toward a role she is good at and is comfortable for her and respects the new situation.</p><p>I love the book "THe Dance of ANger" and the books on tape after because the differance between my reading voice in my head and the author on the tape taught me a lesson that sweetened my world within the sound of my voice. </p><p>and as for my mother...I read Toxic Parents and after about six years of settiing the stage I cut off relations(and therapy and alot lot lot)</p><p>With my childs mental health and safty in the balance for me it was a rellief. That</p><p>desition has made my life so less overwhelmed. </p><p>The thing is you can change how you enter act with her and anyone else...help your sister, and all of it. You set the boundaries that you need for you. and some of the trouble may not come looking for you just because you are not available for it.</p><p>There is help and you, your sister her children can connect with what you do need. Knowing you do, wanting it, asking for it, prioritising and goiing for it results in the steps forward...</p><p>and aging has its advantages...the twenties are so much work...the job, the schooling, the relationships, the sex drive, I am pulling my hair out just remembering...and the important thing is to enjoy it..all of it. ANd do not forget to run when running is the best choice. Do not hang in with a situation that does waste the best years of your life. </p><p>Your sister is lucky..she has you. Bless you both. Do not worry the mother to much...she hasn't had time to regroup since you all moved into adulthood. Give her some space for now.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Ropefree, post: 213481, member: 6271"] Our mothers do give us the tools to love by loving us...after that we become adults and although our mothers relationship is where it is we are now indiviguals and seperate. ANd older women think alot differantly than what people do now. Maybe you think this one through yourself and with your sister identify what it is that can help...including, perhaps, how to direct Mom toward a role she is good at and is comfortable for her and respects the new situation. I love the book "THe Dance of ANger" and the books on tape after because the differance between my reading voice in my head and the author on the tape taught me a lesson that sweetened my world within the sound of my voice. and as for my mother...I read Toxic Parents and after about six years of settiing the stage I cut off relations(and therapy and alot lot lot) With my childs mental health and safty in the balance for me it was a rellief. That desition has made my life so less overwhelmed. The thing is you can change how you enter act with her and anyone else...help your sister, and all of it. You set the boundaries that you need for you. and some of the trouble may not come looking for you just because you are not available for it. There is help and you, your sister her children can connect with what you do need. Knowing you do, wanting it, asking for it, prioritising and goiing for it results in the steps forward... and aging has its advantages...the twenties are so much work...the job, the schooling, the relationships, the sex drive, I am pulling my hair out just remembering...and the important thing is to enjoy it..all of it. ANd do not forget to run when running is the best choice. Do not hang in with a situation that does waste the best years of your life. Your sister is lucky..she has you. Bless you both. Do not worry the mother to much...she hasn't had time to regroup since you all moved into adulthood. Give her some space for now. [/QUOTE]
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Anyone here have awful "support" from your parents?
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