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Substance Abuse
ARghhhhh feeling a bit discouraged...
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<blockquote data-quote="Zardo" data-source="post: 516938" data-attributes="member: 12490"><p>My difficult child no longer thinks he has an SA problem either....that's what makes me worry. Although he is doing well right now and has been for a few months, I worry about this view of his. He thinks that during the time he struggled with substances, the real issue was depression. This could very well be the case, but he ruined his life for a year with defiance and SA. There are a lot of depressed teens that don't go there. It took a lot of ups and downs and false starts to get our difficult child to committ to sobriety. He too thought he didn't have a problem then. It wasn't until he fell on his face a couple more times that he was finally willing to see that all his substance abuse was making the whole course of his life at risk. As we have all discussed and witnessed, that "reality" moment is different for all of them. Yours has been through a lot, for sure, but maybe for him, he has not reached his "reality" moment. Mine does understand that now and is finally clean even though he does not think of himself as an addict, which I suspect means that he will resume some form of use at some point. One of the hardest things is that we cannot make them reach that point, the only REAL change comes from within. Your difficult children moment will come, but we can't know when. That's what is so hard. "Changing for Good" helped me to recognize what stage my difficult child was at and what to do to support that stage. It may help you to read it. Even if he doesn't embrace recovery yet, the messages he will hear while there will have some impact, even if he isn't ready to act upon it. I will say, my difficult child was not fully "reached" during his 90 day stay in Wilderness SA treatment. He embraced sobriety more after being home, falling down a couple of times and then going to IOP. I think he got sick of people seeing him fail and expecting the least of him.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Zardo, post: 516938, member: 12490"] My difficult child no longer thinks he has an SA problem either....that's what makes me worry. Although he is doing well right now and has been for a few months, I worry about this view of his. He thinks that during the time he struggled with substances, the real issue was depression. This could very well be the case, but he ruined his life for a year with defiance and SA. There are a lot of depressed teens that don't go there. It took a lot of ups and downs and false starts to get our difficult child to committ to sobriety. He too thought he didn't have a problem then. It wasn't until he fell on his face a couple more times that he was finally willing to see that all his substance abuse was making the whole course of his life at risk. As we have all discussed and witnessed, that "reality" moment is different for all of them. Yours has been through a lot, for sure, but maybe for him, he has not reached his "reality" moment. Mine does understand that now and is finally clean even though he does not think of himself as an addict, which I suspect means that he will resume some form of use at some point. One of the hardest things is that we cannot make them reach that point, the only REAL change comes from within. Your difficult children moment will come, but we can't know when. That's what is so hard. "Changing for Good" helped me to recognize what stage my difficult child was at and what to do to support that stage. It may help you to read it. Even if he doesn't embrace recovery yet, the messages he will hear while there will have some impact, even if he isn't ready to act upon it. I will say, my difficult child was not fully "reached" during his 90 day stay in Wilderness SA treatment. He embraced sobriety more after being home, falling down a couple of times and then going to IOP. I think he got sick of people seeing him fail and expecting the least of him. [/QUOTE]
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ARghhhhh feeling a bit discouraged...
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