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<blockquote data-quote="recovering doormat" data-source="post: 207436" data-attributes="member: 5941"><p>You poor darling! He sounds like my 15 yr old difficult child 2 - he knows he's got me and his dad right where he wants us, doesn't think anyone can do anything to him.</p><p> </p><p>Glad you have that lawyer in your life, you need at least one authority figure who is in your corner giving you a pat on the back. We also have social workers, DCF, attorney and P.O. involved with us for relatively minor infractions which are worsening because our son thumbs his nose at authority. If you think it's bad now, wait two years, when he's physically larger.</p><p> </p><p>Stick to your guns. Take the door down,that'll blast his circuits. He gets it back when he's fixed your door and you can trust him not to trash your house. Make him help clean up the house and make getting his valued possessions (whatever they are, xbox, easy child, laptop, etc) contingent upon him doing what you ask. I've backed down so many times in the past that my kids think I'm a joke, and I have to expend a lot more energy now to enforce my rules, but you must do it or you'll never have a minute's peace.</p><p> </p><p>You need to make up a list of consequences for him that you can actually enforce. In my sitch, because my son is physically able to pry my hands off him and walk out the door, I can't really ground him, but I can take away stuff and since he lives primarily with dad (not his choice), I can control his access to my house, where he has a rather nice room to himself. I can refuse to give him rides. I never give him cash anymore for any reason because he has been known to spend it on weed.</p><p> </p><p>I'm patting you on the back now for being a brave warrior mom. Stay strong, I've been in your shoes for years now and I know a bit about what you are going through.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recovering doormat, post: 207436, member: 5941"] You poor darling! He sounds like my 15 yr old difficult child 2 - he knows he's got me and his dad right where he wants us, doesn't think anyone can do anything to him. Glad you have that lawyer in your life, you need at least one authority figure who is in your corner giving you a pat on the back. We also have social workers, DCF, attorney and P.O. involved with us for relatively minor infractions which are worsening because our son thumbs his nose at authority. If you think it's bad now, wait two years, when he's physically larger. Stick to your guns. Take the door down,that'll blast his circuits. He gets it back when he's fixed your door and you can trust him not to trash your house. Make him help clean up the house and make getting his valued possessions (whatever they are, xbox, easy child, laptop, etc) contingent upon him doing what you ask. I've backed down so many times in the past that my kids think I'm a joke, and I have to expend a lot more energy now to enforce my rules, but you must do it or you'll never have a minute's peace. You need to make up a list of consequences for him that you can actually enforce. In my sitch, because my son is physically able to pry my hands off him and walk out the door, I can't really ground him, but I can take away stuff and since he lives primarily with dad (not his choice), I can control his access to my house, where he has a rather nice room to himself. I can refuse to give him rides. I never give him cash anymore for any reason because he has been known to spend it on weed. I'm patting you on the back now for being a brave warrior mom. Stay strong, I've been in your shoes for years now and I know a bit about what you are going through. [/QUOTE]
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