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As if it weren't difficult enough already!
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<blockquote data-quote="CAmom" data-source="post: 29359" data-attributes="member: 1835"><p>My son has called for the past three nights, totally obsessed about the fact that we have no immediate plans to visit him. </p><p></p><p>Yesterday, I talked to his easy child and PO, and both feel that we need to keep doing the tough love thing until he earns visits off the grounds which he hasn't done yet. He's not doing anything terrible, but he is wasting a lot of time and energy, trying to "negotiate deals with his easy child and the house staff and becoming angry and frustrated when it doesn't work. He hasn't accepted the fact that he's got to do things their way to get privileges.</p><p></p><p>The general wording his easy child is using is: "I'm not saying your parents CAN'T visit, I'm saying that it's not a good idea." His PO agrees. </p><p></p><p>Unfortunately, my son's interpretation of this is that we COULD come if we wanted to. The fact that we're more interested in compying with his easy child and PO's wishes because it's in our son's best long-term interest totally escapes him! </p><p></p><p>We've gone through this numerous times already, and I've stuck with our stock response that we are going to continue doing EVERYTHING his easy child and PO ask us to do because we want him to succeed in his program. </p><p></p><p>BUT, I've got to say this is wearing me down. And, it doesn't help that his easy child was sitting RIGHT next to him during the conversation last night, reinforcing the fact that he has no interest in keeping him from his family and has NOT said that we absolutely may not visit him, only that he doesn't think it's a good idea. I WISH he'd just say a flat-out "NO!" ARRRGGGG!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="CAmom, post: 29359, member: 1835"] My son has called for the past three nights, totally obsessed about the fact that we have no immediate plans to visit him. Yesterday, I talked to his easy child and PO, and both feel that we need to keep doing the tough love thing until he earns visits off the grounds which he hasn't done yet. He's not doing anything terrible, but he is wasting a lot of time and energy, trying to "negotiate deals with his easy child and the house staff and becoming angry and frustrated when it doesn't work. He hasn't accepted the fact that he's got to do things their way to get privileges. The general wording his easy child is using is: "I'm not saying your parents CAN'T visit, I'm saying that it's not a good idea." His PO agrees. Unfortunately, my son's interpretation of this is that we COULD come if we wanted to. The fact that we're more interested in compying with his easy child and PO's wishes because it's in our son's best long-term interest totally escapes him! We've gone through this numerous times already, and I've stuck with our stock response that we are going to continue doing EVERYTHING his easy child and PO ask us to do because we want him to succeed in his program. BUT, I've got to say this is wearing me down. And, it doesn't help that his easy child was sitting RIGHT next to him during the conversation last night, reinforcing the fact that he has no interest in keeping him from his family and has NOT said that we absolutely may not visit him, only that he doesn't think it's a good idea. I WISH he'd just say a flat-out "NO!" ARRRGGGG! [/QUOTE]
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