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Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
At a crossroads, need advice please
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<blockquote data-quote="PatriotsGirl" data-source="post: 656528" data-attributes="member: 15796"><p>My daughter and I agree that she can never move back home and the rehab joked that they would like that in writing (well, maybe half joking...lol). It is not that I don't love her and want to be with her. Quite the contrary! We both remarked how much we love spending time together now when before it was always tension. But moving back home would be a backwards move and putting her right back in the environment where she just does not succeed.</p><p></p><p>He feels like a slave, why? Everyone works all day. That is life. He does not pay rent or bills - that is <em>why</em> he is working! My daughter's paychecks go straight to rent (which does also cover food, utilities, etc). It is a routine and he needs to have a routine. I am sorry, but 77 days is nothing. That is not even 90 days yet. Everyone has highs and lows - rehab is HARD. It sounds like he is going through a low, which is normal. But he needs to push through it. We just had a family counseling session on the dangers of leaving rehab early. Personally, I would not want that on my shoulders...</p><p></p><p>Also, WHY would you offer to step up and act as the rehab for him? You are not educated or experienced in drug rehabilitation to take over this for them. I know how badly we want to scoop our children up and make everything okay when they are not happy, but that does not normally make everything okay. I am not trying to be mean, just trying to stop you from doing something you may seriously regret. You will do him no favors by rescuing him from getting the help that he is getting.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="PatriotsGirl, post: 656528, member: 15796"] My daughter and I agree that she can never move back home and the rehab joked that they would like that in writing (well, maybe half joking...lol). It is not that I don't love her and want to be with her. Quite the contrary! We both remarked how much we love spending time together now when before it was always tension. But moving back home would be a backwards move and putting her right back in the environment where she just does not succeed. He feels like a slave, why? Everyone works all day. That is life. He does not pay rent or bills - that is [I]why[/I] he is working! My daughter's paychecks go straight to rent (which does also cover food, utilities, etc). It is a routine and he needs to have a routine. I am sorry, but 77 days is nothing. That is not even 90 days yet. Everyone has highs and lows - rehab is HARD. It sounds like he is going through a low, which is normal. But he needs to push through it. We just had a family counseling session on the dangers of leaving rehab early. Personally, I would not want that on my shoulders... Also, WHY would you offer to step up and act as the rehab for him? You are not educated or experienced in drug rehabilitation to take over this for them. I know how badly we want to scoop our children up and make everything okay when they are not happy, but that does not normally make everything okay. I am not trying to be mean, just trying to stop you from doing something you may seriously regret. You will do him no favors by rescuing him from getting the help that he is getting. [/QUOTE]
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At a crossroads, need advice please
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