If the public defender says he can be bonded if he goes to a treatment center, I would do what I could (to a point) to help this happen. But I would recognize and try to remember that it is your son's decision. I would not pay anything. I would not incentivize him in any way.. At the onset, I would accept that he may or may not do what you and I would want. I would remember that the decisions about his life are his. His life is his. That means he takes responsibility to live his own life.
When somebody is serious about a goal or action, they do it hell or high water, because they are committed to it. They don't do it because their Mommy sweetened the deal or made all the arrangements. It is this kind of personal desire that makes change happen.
In my own life, I could not accept this for many years. My son has only wanted from me, what he wanted. Not what I wanted for him, or with him. This caused me infinite pain. I resisted it. Now I don't. I still feel pain, but I recognize mostly that I have a choice about how long I sit with it.
