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At his lowest ebb.
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<blockquote data-quote="blackgnat" data-source="post: 685938" data-attributes="member: 13561"><p>I appreciate all the replies, as always -I know we've all been there at some point or at some level. SWOT, I have been told about the receipt thing. Also that they steal stuff and that certain stores-I believe Whole Foods is one of them- will actually reimburse them if they take the product in and ask for $ instead of credit-and that's WITHOUT a receipt!</p><p></p><p>So, today, exgfs ma takes him to the DMV with all the documents (she's a saint) and I get a call. Difficult Child informs me that,</p><p>" Yeah, it all went through" </p><p>"Well, you should be thrilled about that".</p><p>"No, because they're going to mail it to me in the next two weeks and I can't last that long. I'm losing it and I'm not on medications and if someone doesn't help me, I'm either going to kill someone or kill myself". This conversation is liberally sprinkled with curses and expletives, of course. by the way, he's not on medications because he chose to stop taking them and his dr knows he abuses them, so won't dispense the kind that he wants.</p><p>"Okay, well get yourself to the ER".</p><p>"No, then I'll lose the apartment"</p><p>" Have you been told exactly when you'll get the apartment?"</p><p>"At least two weeks away".</p><p>"Why can't you go to the ER, get some medications to clear your head and then deal with the apartment stuff later?"</p><p>"They'll find out that I was in hospital and that will disqualify me".</p><p>"Can you talk to the person who is in charge of housing and explain your situation?"</p><p>" I haven't even met that guy yet.. I have to fill out some paperwork to get to meet him"</p><p></p><p>Keep inserting all the curse words you know, probably every second word...</p><p></p><p>Every suggestion I made was met with negativity and scorn. I get that he's frustrated, but it's ALWAYS when he's on the verge of possible success that he screws it up...I kept saying, "I don't know what to tell you. I don't see how I can help you", etc. My therapist told me to stop giving him "advice". She said he's NOT going to take it, so why waste your breath? And I think she's right. But I kind of fall into the habit of it when he calls.</p><p></p><p>I told his father to call him (he is more level headed than I am and Difficult Child only reserves the abuse for ME, lucky me) and he did-apparently quite bewildered as to why I had asked him to call?. Er...because you have been RAVING at me for 15 minutes and I think the top of your head is going to come off? And I want to know if you're THAT upset, or whether you're really saving the drama for your mama...</p><p></p><p>Father told him to go to the ER. That's where he was being taken, so as always, time will tell.</p><p></p><p>Crappy thing is that I was having a pretty good day-just found a new mall (I just moved to Vegas a month ago and am enjoying getting my bearings) AND I had a gift certificate . After that call, which I wrongly assumed would be "Hey, ma, I got the ID! They're sending it in a couple of weeks!", I just felt like a deflating balloon. Didn't want to shop/window shop. Kept telling myself-"Don't let him steal your bliss", but he did. MUST TRY HARDER next time!</p><p></p><p>Thing is, too, that I'm sure that when he gets his ID, he won't use it for good, like a job, but for evil. Having an ID means he can hound me for Western Union money (no) and buy liquor or weed (legal in CO) without having to ask anyone else to pick it up for him, because he has the right stuff to REALLY eff himself up...</p><p></p><p>Sorry this is so long. Thanks for reading if you got this far....</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="blackgnat, post: 685938, member: 13561"] I appreciate all the replies, as always -I know we've all been there at some point or at some level. SWOT, I have been told about the receipt thing. Also that they steal stuff and that certain stores-I believe Whole Foods is one of them- will actually reimburse them if they take the product in and ask for $ instead of credit-and that's WITHOUT a receipt! So, today, exgfs ma takes him to the DMV with all the documents (she's a saint) and I get a call. Difficult Child informs me that, " Yeah, it all went through" "Well, you should be thrilled about that". "No, because they're going to mail it to me in the next two weeks and I can't last that long. I'm losing it and I'm not on medications and if someone doesn't help me, I'm either going to kill someone or kill myself". This conversation is liberally sprinkled with curses and expletives, of course. by the way, he's not on medications because he chose to stop taking them and his dr knows he abuses them, so won't dispense the kind that he wants. "Okay, well get yourself to the ER". "No, then I'll lose the apartment" " Have you been told exactly when you'll get the apartment?" "At least two weeks away". "Why can't you go to the ER, get some medications to clear your head and then deal with the apartment stuff later?" "They'll find out that I was in hospital and that will disqualify me". "Can you talk to the person who is in charge of housing and explain your situation?" " I haven't even met that guy yet.. I have to fill out some paperwork to get to meet him" Keep inserting all the curse words you know, probably every second word... Every suggestion I made was met with negativity and scorn. I get that he's frustrated, but it's ALWAYS when he's on the verge of possible success that he screws it up...I kept saying, "I don't know what to tell you. I don't see how I can help you", etc. My therapist told me to stop giving him "advice". She said he's NOT going to take it, so why waste your breath? And I think she's right. But I kind of fall into the habit of it when he calls. I told his father to call him (he is more level headed than I am and Difficult Child only reserves the abuse for ME, lucky me) and he did-apparently quite bewildered as to why I had asked him to call?. Er...because you have been RAVING at me for 15 minutes and I think the top of your head is going to come off? And I want to know if you're THAT upset, or whether you're really saving the drama for your mama... Father told him to go to the ER. That's where he was being taken, so as always, time will tell. Crappy thing is that I was having a pretty good day-just found a new mall (I just moved to Vegas a month ago and am enjoying getting my bearings) AND I had a gift certificate . After that call, which I wrongly assumed would be "Hey, ma, I got the ID! They're sending it in a couple of weeks!", I just felt like a deflating balloon. Didn't want to shop/window shop. Kept telling myself-"Don't let him steal your bliss", but he did. MUST TRY HARDER next time! Thing is, too, that I'm sure that when he gets his ID, he won't use it for good, like a job, but for evil. Having an ID means he can hound me for Western Union money (no) and buy liquor or weed (legal in CO) without having to ask anyone else to pick it up for him, because he has the right stuff to REALLY eff himself up... Sorry this is so long. Thanks for reading if you got this far.... [/QUOTE]
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