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Awkward 'thing' need insightful folks
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<blockquote data-quote="Mattsmom277" data-source="post: 315511" data-attributes="member: 4264"><p>I think there was some great advice already.</p><p></p><p>In keeping with the idea of sending Christmas cards as a form of staying in touch:</p><p>Maybe you could write on the inside of a annual card, a brief but funny or touching memory of their mom each time. Over the years, even if it isn't reciprocated, the sons may enjoy that connection/reminder of their mother. Maybe down the line, they'll marry and their spouses will be reading the cards too, and with encouragement, the sons may extend a hand? If not, you are honoring your cousin and her remaining sons, while yourself enjoying each yearly memory session during the holidays when you are writing in their card. If you do it for you, and to honor your cousin, without expectations, I am betting you'll enjoy writing out those cards.</p><p></p><p>I wish that people understood the dynamics of small families more. When it comes to your level of small family, it is common for one person to wish for more contact while the others may really just see a distant cousin they didn't grow up knowing, and without reaching out conciously to form a bond, one doesn't exist. I wouldn't take it personally. But I do hope that you don't allow yourself to hurt over their lack of interest. It is surely not a reflection of you personally. (((hugs)))</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Mattsmom277, post: 315511, member: 4264"] I think there was some great advice already. In keeping with the idea of sending Christmas cards as a form of staying in touch: Maybe you could write on the inside of a annual card, a brief but funny or touching memory of their mom each time. Over the years, even if it isn't reciprocated, the sons may enjoy that connection/reminder of their mother. Maybe down the line, they'll marry and their spouses will be reading the cards too, and with encouragement, the sons may extend a hand? If not, you are honoring your cousin and her remaining sons, while yourself enjoying each yearly memory session during the holidays when you are writing in their card. If you do it for you, and to honor your cousin, without expectations, I am betting you'll enjoy writing out those cards. I wish that people understood the dynamics of small families more. When it comes to your level of small family, it is common for one person to wish for more contact while the others may really just see a distant cousin they didn't grow up knowing, and without reaching out conciously to form a bond, one doesn't exist. I wouldn't take it personally. But I do hope that you don't allow yourself to hurt over their lack of interest. It is surely not a reflection of you personally. (((hugs))) [/QUOTE]
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